


Ball For Me

by sleepingplanets



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fashion & Models, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Slow Romance, Swearing, Underage Drinking, a lot of swearing, doyoung isn't here for your nonsense, i dont know, or just regular, taeyong is a sassy bitch and i love it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:15:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 26,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23940670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepingplanets/pseuds/sleepingplanets
Summary: It's hard being young and rich with high standards. Doyoung is an executive editor for Vogue who brings the hammer down on those who don't live up to his expectations. He has an eye for beauty and has seemingly become enraptured by the magazine's latest cover star, Jaehyun Jung, an up and coming model and singer who recently moved to Manhattan. Unfortunately, there's no such thing as privacy in the city that never sleeps, something Doyoung has already been exposed to and something Jaehyun was only beginning to understand.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Lee Taeyong/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 19
Kudos: 95





	1. I Could Be Your Supermodel

**Author's Note:**

> -DISCLAIMER: i own nothing but the plot and am not affiliated with any of the brands or companies that are mentioned  
> -the drinking age in the USA is 21, but in most other countries it's 18, so to avoid the wrath of the gods', i tagged this with "underage drinking" to be safe  
> -this idea came to me when i was in the shower so please bear with me  
> -this is going to be long and slow, fair warning.  
> -im not that funny

“The issue is going to print in two days, we cannot make anymore last minute additions for this month!” Doyoung snapped, frightening the poor intern in front of him. She was a young woman, fresh out of college and dressed in what Doyoung assumed was the most expensive outfit in her closet. He felt bad, he really did. Doyoung never liked raising his voice in general, but especially with coworkers. This girl doesn’t even know what she was in for if she expects to stay in the world of high fashion and thinks Doyoung is the scariest person ever. He took a deep breath.

“Yeri, I’m sorry,” he apologized. “Please tell Haechan that I will not put his article into this month’s issue of the magazine. If he really thinks tweed is making a sure fire comeback in the fall, he can propose the article for the upcoming issue. I am not making any more changes with two days til print.”

Yeri nodded but her voice came out shaky. “B-but, Mr. Kim, Haechan is just going to send me back to ask you again,” she said, voice as soft as a baby bird’s.

Doyoung, eyes closed and lips pressed tightly together, breathed in and breathed out. Pause. He turned back to his desk and quickly scribbled something down on a sticky note. He walked back up to Yeri and handed it to her. “For Haechan. If tweed is that important, he can come up here and plead his own case. You can leave now,” he finished, leaving no room for an objection. 

Yeri chewed on her bottom lip, expression unsure as she fiddled with the note, not sure if she should read it. She really didn’t want to deal with Doyoung and Haechan’s nonsense. Taking a breath, she gave a solemn look to Doyoung before nodding and walking out of his office. It wasn’t until she was in the elevator did she feel safe enough to actually read the note. Unfolding it, she let out a snort. What was she expecting?

_ Fuck your twead. -D _

Back on the 20th floor, Doyoung stared out of his floor to ceiling windows, the view overlooking midtown Manhattan. The streets were bustling as people walked and drove around, like lost ants in a chaotic colony. But yet, there was still a certain type of harmony to it all. Everyone knows where they are going and when they need to be at that place, It’s all so--

His office phone rings and Doyoung winces. “Disruptive…” he mumbled before picking it up. “Doyoung speaking.”

_ “Excuse me, Mr. Kim? Mr. Taeyong Lee is here for you.”  _ It was Renjun, his receptionist.

“That’s odd, Jungwoo didn’t tell me I had an appointment with him today,” Doyoung said, quickly flipping through the itinerary on his desk.

“Apparently this is a surprise visit,” Renjun said. Doyoung could almost feel the younger man shrugging his shoulders. “Although you really shouldn’t be surprised, he does this fairly often. Anyway, he’s on his way.” 

Doyoung sighed. “Fine, fine, I guess he just owns the place now, doesn’t he? Thanks, Ren,” he finished, placing the phone back in it’s receiver. He planted his butt down firmly on the front edge of his desk, his arms crossed as he waited. 

Taeyong is a strange force of nature and it bleeds into every aspect of his being. Doyoung sees it in the way the other man walks towards his office, every ounce of him dripping in confidence. He walked past the office workers dressed in oversized white button down and black slacks, the buttons messily done and sunglasses on. His hair was a freshly dyed bright red, styled messily. If he were anyone else, it wouldn’t be a look. On Taeyong though, it was high fashion. His leather loafers made clicking sounds that grew louder as he came closer. A small smile broke out on Doyoung’s face when Taeyong dramatically made his way into the office, his silent bodyguard staying outside. The shirt bellowed from the breeze caused by the door and he came to a full stop in front of Doyoung.

“Doie,” Taeyong said, taking his glasses off, eyes sharp.

“Yongie,” Doyoung responded. There was a pause before both men broke out into smiles and gave the other a friendly hug. “Why are you here?” Doyoung asked after letting Taeyong go.

Taeyong shrugged, his dangling earrings glittering underneath the office lights. “I can’t come and see my best friend?” he said innocently as he sat down in one of the lounge chairs in front of Doyoung’s desk. He crossed his legs elegantly. 

Doyoung rolled his eyes. “If you really wanted to do a social call, you could always just come to my apartment after work,” he said. “By the way, he’s new.” Doyoung said, nodding his head towards the bodyguard outside. He was tall and on the thinner side. His long chestnut brown hair was tied back in a small ponytail and it worked well with his charcoal gray suit. Doyoung can only guess it was personally designed by Taeyong.

Taeyong spared a glance at the man outside. “Oh yeah,” he said, quickly. “His name is Yuta. I needed someone better to be my personal guard. Last one just wasn’t cutting it.” 

“Hmm,” Doyoung hummed. “Not too bad on the eyes either.”

Taeyong nodded absentmindedly as his eyes wandered around the office. He’s been in there plenty of times but something new just caught his eye. “Oh god, why do you have that up?” he asked and Doyoung could see the red blush creeping up his neck. Taeyong gestured at the new poster that Doyoung had just put up a few days ago. It was a blown up portrait of this month’s cover featuring one Taeyong Lee looking gorgeous. He was shot in profile, his red hair seemingly on fire and he was wearing a simple white button down just like he was today. He looked young but serious and Doyoung had written the headlining story himself, “Boy Wonder: Taeyong Like You’ve Never Seen Him Before.” It was one of those special editions where there weren't any other headlines or articles advertised on the cover, and Doyoung was especially proud of himself. His friend looked great on the cover of the magazine that he helped put together. 

Doyoung smiled. “Because I think that might be my favorite edition so far but I’m also super biased,” he said. 

“You could’ve blown up any of my other professionally taken pictures,” Taeyong said, a slight scowl on his face but it quickly disappeared. “I digress though, that’s not why I’m here.” Taeyong’s face lit up excitedly. “I heard who next month’s cover model is going to be. A certain Jaehyun Jung, isn’t it?”

Doyoung nodded. “Word travels fast, I see. Yeah, Jaehyun is coming by next Wednesday and I’m going to be overseeing the photo shoot. One of the higher ups thought it might be best to get him on our magazine cover before anyone else since he’s really starting to blow up.” 

“Well, it might make you happy to know that my team is going to be the ones styling him for the photo shoot. I might drop by but no promises. You know, stuff always comes up at the last minute if I don’t do everything myself.” 

Doyoung had to roll his eyes at that. “You know you’re allowed to take a break right?” It was true. While Taeyong was the creative director of his own brand, he also had assistants, designers, fabric workers, marketing managers, and a whole crew of workers that help him run the company day to day.

Taeyong frowned. “That’s the pot calling the kettle black, Doyoung,” he said, tilting his head slightly. “How many nights a week do you stay late here?” Now it was Doyoung’s turn to be a bit embarrassed. He understood Taeyong’s plight a little too well. It’s just that nothing felt right unless Doyoung gave his stamp of approval. He worked hard to get to where he currently is. No one expected this scrawny kid from the east coast to be an editor for _Vogue_ , __ one of the top fashion magazines in the world. Unfortunately though, the road to success meant that Doyoung had to do a lot of it on his own and that left him somewhat jaded to the idea of having other people work for him, especially when he knows that some might want him ousted from the position. Of course, he had his close network of coworkers and friends, such as Taeyong and another being his PA, Jungwoo, but that circle was narrow and doesn’t easily open up to others. Needless to say, he has no argument for Taeyong.

He sighed, giving up. “Fine, fine. Maybe we both could use a vacation,” he said with a soft laugh. “So I shouldn’t be expecting you at the photo shoot but if you do show up, I should kneel and bow to you, is that right?” 

Taeyong laughed at that. It was genuine and heartfelt and when working in this industry, it helped to be around someone who was real beyond the makeup, clothes, and cameras. “I’ll accept the bow. If you kneel, people might get the wrong idea. Also, a vacation sounds great to be completely real with you. However, there is one more thing I want to bring up to you before I leave you to brood in your glass tower.” Doyoung, raised an eyebrow and waited. “I’m throwing a party next Friday. A little, uh, get together, to celebrate the launch of NEO City’s new collection.”

“A ‘little’ get together? Or a rager that’s going to last until 4AM?”

“Haven’t worked out all the details yet,” Taeyong said, a feline smile gracing his lips. “And you should invite Jeno too, it’s about time that boy gets out and has some fun with other adults.”

Doyoung held up a hand to stop Taeyong. “I understand that Jeno is a whole adult but you do realize he’s only 20, right?”

Taeyong rolled his eyes and stood up. “You’re overthinking things. Have him bring a friend if he wants but I promise he’s going to be fine. Also, no one is going to card him,” he adds with a wink. “Now, I need to get going, I have meetings today unfortunately. But I expect you there next Friday. If you don’t show up, I’m going to come drag you there myself.” He wasn’t joking either. As his best friend, Doyoung was obligated to be at every launch party. 

Doyoung waved at him as he made his way to the office door, his bodyguard not moving from his position until Taeyong was a good couple of steps in front of him. In his line of work, Doyoung developed an eye for detail and he didn’t miss the little smile of admiration that Yuta gave Taeyong. 

Scoffing, Doyoung sat down at his desk and immediately pulled out his phone. His first message was to Jungwoo. 

**DY: Can you clear out my schedule for next Friday night?**

**JW: You got it, boss!**

His next message was to Taeyong.

**DY: Yuta def wants to bang u**

**TY: YO**

**TY: Why are you so loud??**

**TY: Do you really think so tho?**

~~~~~~

Doyoung had never planned on sharing a living space with his cousin but he could say with his whole heart that he’d rather live with Jeno than anyone else. They were always close to begin with but ever since Jeno moved to New York to study at NYU, Doyoung took it upon himself to take care of the younger man. Needless to say, Doyoung was starting to get lonely as well as homesick living by himself. He had a large apartment in Brooklyn, far away from the hustle and bustle of Manhattan but still close enough that Jeno could take the train to school. And it’s not like Doyoung had anyone special to live with. He was single and in the prime of his life but at this point, Doyoung had given up hope on ever finding anyone who could put up with him and his high maintenance ways. No thanks, Jeno and his cat will do just fine.

He couldn’t really remember when the last time he went on a date was either. Perhaps it was a year ago? A year and a half? It didn’t matter. While he did suffer from the occasional FOMO when seeing his friends out with their significant others, he was in no mood to go looking for anyone himself. Besides, things were easier when he’s by himself.

Doyoung unlocked his apartment door and walked into the warmly lit entryway. Taking off his shoes, the first one to greet him was Seol, Jeno’s sweet little calico cat. She came up and rubbed her head on Doyoung’s leg. At the beginning, Doyoung wasn’t the biggest fan of her or the hair she left on his clothes. (“This is Burberry!” Doyoung exclaimed once, not taking into consideration that he was yelling at a cat while its owner stood there and laughed at him.) Nowadays though, she was a calming presence in his life, and Doyoung allowed himself to give her some head scratches for being a genuinely good cat. 

Jeno soon followed, dressed in sweats and a long sleeve crewneck. He didn’t share Doyoung’s love for fashion despite all of his cousin’s nagging. “Ah shit, the master of the house is home before midnight for once,” he joked, picking up Seol. “I made dinner, if you want to eat with me. It’s nothing special but it’s edible.” He walked over to the kitchen and Doyoung followed suit, quietly happy that he didn’t have to cook tonight. Jeno had made rice, fried fish cakes, and put some kimchi on the side. It wasn’t anything extravagant but Doyoung was grateful nonetheless. Jeno has this tendency to believe that Doyoung’s standards for everything in his life were unreachable, and he was right, but Doyoung does make exceptions for Jeno. Also, you can’t go wrong with rice and fish cakes. 

After setting the table, they ate quietly, telling the other little bits of their day. “It’s so strange having you here for dinner,” Jeno said, taking a bite of his rice. “Usually I won’t see you until the next morning.”

Doyoung had the decency to look ashamed. “I’m sorry, I know I’m gone a lot. Work has just been hectic lately, what with this month’s issue coming up. Taeyong mentioned to me today that I stay way too long in the office when I don't need to.”

“Dude, there’s no need to apologize, you’re just doing your job. Did Taeyong come and see you today? How’s he doing?”

Doyoung nodded and hummed. “Yep. He’s alright, I guess. Has a pretty new bodyguard too. They stopped by for a visit. Taeyong’s crew is helping to style this month’s cover photoshoot. Also, he’s throwing some sort of party next weekend to celebrate the launch of his latest collection. Wants to know if you’re interested in coming.” 

Jeno seemed genuinely surprised. “Taeyong is inviting me too? I thought those kinds of parties were for like, the elite,” he mumbled. 

Doyoung shrugged. “Your cousin is an executive editor for Vogue and the creative director of NEO City, one of the biggest fashion brands in the world, is your friend,” he said nonchalantly. Looking up at Jeno, he said, “While you might not feel like it, that makes you one of us.”

“Jesus, I hate it when you say it like that,” Jeno mumbled and Doyoung couldn’t blame him for being a little hot tempered when it came down to it. Both Doyoung and Jeno were raised to live modestly by their family but Doyoung was the one who always wanted more for himself. While living a modest life and working a simple job might be enough for others, it wasn’t for him.

“Hey now,” Doyoung held his hands up in surrender, “You don’t have to go. Taeyong just wanted me to extend the invitation out to you. He said you can bring a friend if it’ll make you more comfortable.”

Jeno grunted, still seemingly uninterested. “We’ll see,” he said, poking around his food with his chopsticks. “I don’t know why you bother going either. You were never a party person.”

“I go simply for Taeyong,” Doyoung replied simply. “If it were anyone else, I wouldn’t.”

Jeno chuckled. “Maybe this time you’ll find some random stranger who will sweep you off of your feet for once.”

“Doubt it,” Doyoung scoffed. “No one in this business feels… real,” he said after a long pause. “I don’t know, maybe I just have a hard time finding something deeper than money and status.”

Jeno shook his head dramatically. “Here we go again, Doyoung Kim with his high ass standards.” The younger man laughed.

Doyoung threw a napkin at him. “Watch it before I kick you out and keep Seol.”

~~~~~~

Jaehyun had never really planned for his life to turn out like this. He wasn’t too sure if he was fully cut out for life in the spotlight but he wasn’t going to lie, the benefits that came with it are pretty sweet. Him and his family no longer have to worry about money. He set them up for financial stability for the rest of this lifetime and maybe even for the next. Also, despite the mental strain, being a model wasn’t too hard. He was one of the lucky few that didn’t have to worry about dieting because his image was centered around being more muscular. Not to mention, this job gave him a very real segway into his music career which is what he truly wanted in the end.

He just never really saw himself doing anything like this. When Jaehyun was younger, he would tell his mom that he wanted to be a doctor or a fancy pants lawyer in the big city. But he was willing to settle for some small time job back in Connecticut as well. Guess whatever high power above had bigger plans for him.

To think, this all started because he decided to take on a dare. It’s strange how things work out.

~~~~~~

The days pass by way too fast. Before Doyoung knew it, Wednesday had rolled around and he was on his way to meet his model for the photoshoot. Doyoung paced around his office, phone in hand, sending out emails and texting his coworkers that he was going to be out of the office for the afternoon due to the shoot. 

Meanwhile, Jungwoo sat calmly on one of the lounge chairs, typing away on his laptop as he fixed Doyoung’s schedule and prepared the one for tomorrow. Doyoung really lucked out when it came to Jungwoo. He doesn’t think he’ll get a better personal assistant than the young man. Calm and collected, Jungwoo did everything as he was told and Doyoung never had to repeat himself. But he also wasn’t afraid to speak up when he needed and Doyoung appreciates that more than he could ever say. It was mainly Jungwoo who would convince Doyoung to finally go home and get some rest, remind him that he’s a human being that needs to eat, and tell Doyoung that he needs to ease up his attitude once in a while. The younger man kept him grounded and he radiated positivity which was always a welcome change of pace. 

“Doyoung,” Jungwoo said, “Jaehyun will be here in about 30 minutes, we should head down to the set.”

“Hmm? Oh, yes. Let’s go.” 

The photo shoot was taking place a few floors below Doyoung’s office. When he got there, he saw that for the most part, everything was running smoothly. Some workers were putting together the last couple of set pieces. They had about three sets to shoot on today, each one going with a different outfit. The photographer, Johnny Suh, was already set up and currently running over last minute notes with his assistant. The hair stylist was set up near the makeup table where all of the palettes were laid out and the makeup artist himself was already here. 

“Good to see you, Ten,” Doyoung said as he approached the shorter man, Jungwoo trailing behind him.

Ten grinned and leaned in for a hug. “Always a pleasure, baby. You know I’m always willing to help make people look hot.”

Doyoung rolled his eyes but he returned the affection. Taking a look around, he realized someone was missing. “I guess Taeyong couldn’t make it. At least his team is here.” 

Ten shrugged. “You never know, he has a habit of surprising everyone with his appearance. He paid me a visit to my apartment just yesterday.”

Doyoung smirked. “Was it to invite you to a party on Friday night?”

“Ah, I see he already got to you,” Ten said as he cleaned his brushes and rearranged his materials. “So are you going?”

“I might as well. It’s not like I have any say in this. And neither do you, but I know you’re already going. You never turn down a party,” Doyoung said, and laughed when he saw Ten frowning at him. Suddenly, Doyoung was hit with a thought. “Did you see his new bodyguard?”

Ten, always a sucker for gossip, widened his eyes and immediately became more excited. “Oh my god, yes!” 

“I think they’re going to bang eventually,” Doyoung whispered, as if this was some big conspiracy. “I feel it in my gut.”

Ten nodded his head quickly. “Oh definitely. The dude looks at Taeyong like he hung the moon himself.”

There was a soft throat clearing behind them. It was Jungwoo, a small smile dancing on his face. “Sorry to bother you, but Jaehyun should be on his way up. Also, how do you know if this bodyguard isn’t just super into his job?”

Both men smiled at Jungwoo. “Because, sweet little Jungwoo,” Doyoung began and paused, thinking it over. “Actually, it’s something you’ll need to see for yourself but the guy has puppy dog eyes for Taeyong and judging by Taeyong’s reaction to when I told him, we might be dealing with a two way street here.” 

“Ok,” Jungwoo started but was interrupted by the sound of the studio doors opening. In walks Jaehyun Jung in all of his six feet tall glory, dressed in a simple pair of skinny jeans and a gray crewneck sweater. 

“Oh, yum,” Ten said under his breath as the three men watch Jaehyun approach Johnny. The two shared a quick hug.  _ Hmm, they’ve probably worked together before. _

“Behave, Ten,” Doyoung mumbled. “You’re on the clock.” 

Ten rolled his eyes so hard, Doyoung swore they did a full 360. “I’m my own boss, Doie. And don’t act like you wouldn’t climb that like a tree.” 

Doyoung watched as Johnny and Jaehyun wrapped up their conversation and the latter began making his way over to them. This was Doyoung’s first time meeting Jaehyun in person and he wasn’t too prideful to admit that the man was devastatingly handsome. He was beautiful with a face that was sculpted to death. There was some baby fat leftover on his cheeks but everything else was sharp angles. Soft dark hair fell across his forehead. “Good afternoon,” he greeted the men with a smile, showing off a pair of dimples and smile lines. Yeah, ok, he was a nicely wrapped present.

Doyoung stepped up, putting his official editor face on. “Good afternoon, it’s wonderful to meet you, Jaehyun,” he said, putting his hand out for a shake. Jaehyun’s hand was bigger than his and they were calloused on the palms and Doyoung is going to ignore the fact he wanted to know exactly what this man does with his hands in his free time.

“It’s wonderful to have you here as our next cover star. My name is Doyoung, I’m one of the executive editors for Vogue. Now, why don’t you go and meet with the fashion team over there and they’ll take you to the dressing rooms. You can leave your personal belongings in there and they’ll get you in your first outfit. Ten will do your makeup here.” Ten gave a small wave. “Water and catering are out here if you get peckish,” Doyoung finished with a bright smile. 

Jaehyun returned it with a small grin of his own, boyish and playful. “Thank you,” he said before heading off with the fashion team. 

Once he was out of earshot, Ten let out a groan. “I want him to step on me,” 

Doyoung swatted at him. “Can you hold yourself together for at least a few hours? We have no idea what he’s even going to look like in the clothes Taeyong picked out.” 

Ten looked at him like he just said the stupidest thing ever. “First of all, don’t insult Taeyong like that. Second of all, homeboy could wear a trash bag and still look fine as fuck.”

Doyoung let out his nth sigh of the day.  _ Patience is the key. Patience is a virtue. _

Jaehyun returned about 10 minutes later dressed in a nice pair of black washed jeans, a white graphic tee, and a black bomber with intricate gold embroidery on the shoulders, leading down towards the elbows. Around his neck were a few layers of silver chains. “This is actually a pretty rad outfit,” he said, fiddling with the jacket as he looked at himself in the mirror. 

“You look wonderful, hon!” Ten exclaimed excitedly (and Doyoung cringed inwardly). “Now take a seat and I’ll make you even prettier. Seulgi, you can start on his hair,” Ten said to the hair stylist who simply nodded and they both got to work. 

Doyoung took a few steps back to study their work from afar while Jungwoo sat on a chair nearby, phone in hand. He was either typing up emails or playing Candy Crush, but Doyoung wasn’t going to knock him for wanting a mental break. It wasn’t until Jaehyun sat down in front of the bright lights of the makeup station did Doyoung notice that his hair was a very dark shade of blue. It reminded him of velvet or a rich silk, something expensive and soft. His skin was a pretty shade of porcelain and he had a pretty pair of lips. He sat and played on his phone while Ten and Seulgi worked, not moving an inch. It didn’t even look like he was breathing. Doyoung was tempted to take a snapshot of Jaehyun right where he was and in this position; a statue of a god being worshipped by mortals. Or Adonis in the flesh. Angels in New York City. 

His phone buzzed in his pocket, distracting him from his thoughts.

**JW: Careful, you might burn holes into the side of his head.**

Doyoung turned around to glare at him but the other man didn’t even flinch. Doyoung sighed and moved closer to Jungwoo. “I can’t admire the artwork these days?” he says quietly.

Jungwoo pursed his lips. “Not saying you can’t but you might not want to make it too obvious,” he said before his attention was back on his phone. He was playing Candy Crush. Doyoung rolled his eyes.

It didn’t take long for Ten and Seulgi to finish their magic. Seulgi had brushed and blow dried Jaehyun’s hair back, adding some product for volume and to hold it all together. A piece of it fell across his left eye and Doyoung didn’t know if it was by accident or on purpose but it worked. Ten kept the makeup simple with the slightest smokey eye and eyeliner. His brows were filled in and matched the shade of his hair almost perfectly and there was the slightest tinge of pink to his lips but nothing overbearing. Yep, Adonis in the flesh.

“Alright, you’re all set! Slay, bitch,” Ten said, sending Jaehyun off and Doyoung almost punched him for referring to their model as “bitch.” Fortunately for Ten, Jaehyun laughed at him, a lovely, genuine sound coming from his chest.

“I’ll do my best,” he said earnestly before walking towards the set, high fiving Johnny on the way. 

Jaehyun was a natural in front of the camera. He resonated a cool and easy confidence, his face almost nonchalant. But his eyes… There was something dangerous about them. A strange determination and a glint of knowing the kind of effect he has on people. It was a new type of power and Doyoung was very interested in knowing what it feels like to be the center of Jaehyun’s attention. 

“I’m not saying he looks like he could choke me out but....” Doyoung trailed off. He shook his head quickly, not wanting to finish that thought. 

Jungwoo, bless his heart, either chose to ignore him or was completely enraptured in his phone until a text notification came up. “Er, Doyoung?” he started, sounding unsure and Doyoung hated that tone of voice. “Taeyong just texted me saying that he’s bringing the third outfit for today’s photo shoot himself.”

Doyoung whipped his head around to look at Jungwoo. “What?” he asked, voice low. “What do you mean ‘third outfit’? His team was supposed to bring all the outfits here with them now! They’re all supposed to be here!” He watched as Jungwoo hurriedly typed out another message.

“He said that he needed to make some last minute adjustments so he just sent his team with two. He should be here soon!”

Doyoung sighed and rubbed his temples. “Tell him that if he doesn’t get here in less than an hour, I’m going to wring his neck,” he said and that was final. Jungwoo nodded and rushed to type out the message. Why was it so hard to stick to a schedule?

**JW: He says you have less than hour to get here otherwise he’s going to wring your neck**

**TY: I’d like to see him try**

**TY: He’s going to be so happy once he sees what ive done**

Jungwoo decided that it might be best to not tell Doyoung about those last two messages. The poor man already looks like he’s going to blow a small fuse. 

~~~~~~

Luckily for all of them, Taeyong arrived about 45 minutes later while Jaehyun was doing his second set of photos. This time, Jaehyun was dressed in larger baggy clothes made of latex and leather with gold chains on his neck and a small pair of matching gold earrings. He didn’t look too comfortable and Doyoung couldn’t really blame him. He was never a big fan of the shiny latex look but for what it’s worth, Jaehyun pulls it off nicely.

About halfway through the shoot, the doors of the studio flung open and in walked Taeyong, dressed as casually as one can expect him to be. He had on ripped black jeans, a black button down, and a black and white houndstooth coat. Thrown over his shoulder was a large suit carrier. Yuta trailed in behind him dressed in a white button down and gray pants with a pair of brown suede boots. Johnny and Jaehyun were unfazed by the ruckus as they went over a few shots with the assistant photographer, Mark. 

“If Tae doesn’t do anything with Yuta, then I just might,” Ten said to Doyoung as he sorted out his equipment. 

“Can you not be horny for a minute?” Doyoung snapped before whirling around to face Taeyong who looked like he didn’t have a care in the world. “And  _ you.  _ A warning would’ve been mighty fucking fine.” 

The smallest of grins broke out on Yuta’s face while Taeyong just raised his free hand in surrender. “I know, I know,” the older man said. “Give me some credit though, I did make it in the time frame that you gave me. Besides, this piece is special so I want it to be perfect.” He patted the suit carrier fondly. “Jungwoo, do you mind bringing this to the dressing room? My team is expecting it.” Jungwoo nodded and got up, taking the carrier and rushed to the dressing room. 

Taeyong turned back to Doyoung and didn’t even shrink under his judgemental eyes. “Hey now, you’ll forgive me after you see the suit on Jaehyun. Trust me, it was practically designed for him. And I expect a thank you as well.” 

Doyoung scoffed and turned his attention back to the photoshoot. The boys were wrapping up their second session. “You seem to be very confident in yourself this time.”

Taeyong simply chuckled and sat down on a nearby chair.

~~~~~~

Maybe Doyoung  _ should  _ say thank you to Taeyong. The second session wrapped up fairly quickly after Taeyong’s arrival and Jaehyun was already on his way to change into his final outfit. When he came back, Doyoung swears that everyone, except for Taeyong, had to pick their jaw off the floor. Meanwhile, the designer sat back and beamed at his latest creation. 

_ A god among us stupid mortals. _

Jaehyun had on a fitted black blazer with gold flowers embroidered all over and black sequins on the lapels. Everybody is just going to have to accept the fact that he didn’t have a shirt on underneath and that his chest is well defined. His pants had the same floral pattern on them and he had on a pair of shiny black oxfords. The whole thing looked exquisite and expensive and Doyoung firmly believed that no one could ever look as good in this outfit as Jaehyun does. Taeyong was right; it was made for Jaehyun.

Ten was all but drooling as he touched up Jaehyun’s makeup. Seulgi simply brushed back his hair and applied the tiniest bit of product before sending him on his way and Doyoung is now a firm believer that she left that little loose piece over Jaehyun’s eye on purpose. Jaehyun remained calm on the outside, and the whole process of him doing his hair and makeup would’ve been almost silent if it weren’t for the sudden wolf whistles and mock cheers coming from Johnny and Mark.

“Oooooohhhhh, looking good there, handsome!” Johnny shouted with a bright smile. 

“You look like a final mob boss. Like someone just messed with your daughter and you’re about to kick their ass,” Mark said in between peals of laughter. 

Jaehyun got up with an eye roll once Ten gave him the signal to get up. “Shut up, both of you,” he said and Doyoung swears he saw the faintest blush creep up Jaehyun’s neck. “It’s the clothes that look good, not me.”

There was a beat of silence. Doyoung wanted to slap Jaehyun.

“HA!” All eyes turned to Taeyong. He looked just the slightest bit incredulous. “There’s no need to pretend to be humble around any of us, honey. This whole look is 25% my work and 75% you already being attractive. My clothes emphasize what already exists,” he said and his tone was final.

Jaehyun paused, and Doyoung figured it was because he didn’t know how to respond in general. Their eyes briefly met and Doyoung simply nodded, reassuring Jaehyun as best he could silently.

The young man sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, a chuckle leaving his mouth. “I guess I have to believe both of you,” Jaehyun said, his eyes flashing between Doyoung and Taeyong. “After all, you are professionals.” With that last comment, he moved to the set with Mark and Johnny following behind. The shoot went forward. 

Doyoung moved closer to Taeyong. “Pretend?”

Taeyong nodded. “While it may not be completely fake humility, there’s no way he isn’t self aware about how he looks. His eyes are too sharp.” 

“I’m glad I’m not the only one that noticed,” Doyoung mumbled. 

“It’s really hard not to,” Taeyong replied. The two watched as Jaehyun did several poses on the set, some with the guidance of Mark and Johnny, some he came up with himself. At some point, Doyoung is going to have to thank the set designers personally. They really stepped their game up this time around. Jaehyun looked almost ethereal in front of a large, round shoji window that was opened to reveal a golden, Chinese style dragon in the background. The entire set was bathed in warm yellow and gold tones. 

Doyoung sighed. “Someone please tell me why he looks like a sexy trophy.”

“Oh my,” Taeyong said, turning to look at his friend. “Does the great Doyoung Kim have a crush on our model?”

Doyoung rolled his eyes. “Shut up. I just like to admire beauty.”

Taeyong didn’t look like he believed him one bit but he didn’t say anything about it. Unfortunately for Doyoung, he missed the mischievous look Taeyong shot at him. 

~~~~~~

The shoot eventually wrapped up, everybody clapping and cheering once they were done and the blush was prevalent on Jaehyun’s face as he thanked the staff. While Doyoung thinks that some of his humbleness is a show, he likes to think that Jaehyun is actually really shy when it comes to  _ too much  _ attention. 

Doyoung shook his hand when he rejoined the group. “You did wonderfully! I’m sure the next issue’s cover is going to look beautiful,” he said, his words honest and excited. 

Jaehyun gave him a small grin but it was enough for Doyoung to see those dimples again. “Thank you for this opportunity,” he said, his hand lingering on Doyoung’s for a second longer than it needed to.

Doyoung pulled away, suddenly feeling very warm. “Well, I have to get back to my office. Please take your time getting ready and enjoy some refreshments.” Turning to the staff, he exclaimed, “Good job, everyone!” He said bye to his friends, took one last look at Jaehyun in that damn suit, and promptly turned on his heels and headed for the door. Jungwoo followed closely behind and the two whispered to each other. 

“Was I being too obvious?” he asked once they were alone in the elevator. 

“Obvious about what? That you clearly want to sit on Jaehyun’s lap while he’s wearing that suit or the fact you’re in denial about being attracted to him?” Jungwoo responded, not looking up from his phone.

“Nothing misses your eyes or ears, does it?” Doyoung asked him sarcastically. “We won’t speak of this again.”

Jungwoo hummed. “Sure,” he simply stated.

~~~~~

Jaehyun wasn’t too sure what to say. “What- what do you mean ‘keep it?’” he asked Taeyong.

Taeyong glanced at him from where he was currently texting on his phone. “Keep the suit,” he stated. 

“B-but it’s yours! I can’t keep it, it’s probably worth so much money too” Jaehyun sputtered.

Taeyong looked at him with something akin to pity. “Honey, I have a spare, don’t worry. Think of it as a gift. I don’t think anyone would look as good in it as you do anyway.” Jaehyun was about to argue with him again when Taeyong held up a hand to silence him. “Don’t argue with me, please. What are you doing on Friday night?” 

Jaehyun, still lost and confused, could only muster up a quiet, “Huh?” He already felt like a massive idiot.

“I’m holding a party at Simon Says here in Manhattan on Friday night. It’s to celebrate the launch of my new collection and I’m trying to invite you to come,” Taeyong stated. “It’s a private affair.”

“Oh,” Jaehyun breathed out. “Are you sure? I’m not sure if I really fit in with the crowd there?”

Taeyong rolled his eyes. “You’ll be fine. Wear that suit to the party if it makes you feel better. Now,” he got up with a huff. “I expect to see you there. If not, I’ll send Yuta and have him drag you from your home.” With that, he turned and left, much like Doyoung did.

Speaking to Taeyong was strange. While Jaehyun admired the man and didn’t see him as much of a threat, there was something about the way that Taeyong held himself that left no room for argument from anyone. His word was law. 

“You should just go,” a voice next to him chimed in. It was Ten, the make up artist. He was still packing away his palettes and cleaning his brushes. “Taeyong always throws bangers and he doesn’t personally invite a lot of people. You must have impressed both him and Doyoung.”

At that, Jaehyun turned to face him fully. “Doyoung?” 

“Oh yeah,” Ten scoffed, “You didn’t notice but you had him enraptured during your entire shoot. It was almost cute.” He put the last palette down into a large carrying case before looking Jaehyun dead in the eye, hands on his hips. Jesus Christ, he gave off almost the same vibe as Taeyong but Ten actually feels like a physical threat. “You should just go. If not for Taeyong or Doyoung, go for a drink and a good time. Who knows? Maybe you’ll meet a face that’s just as pretty as yours,” he said with a giggle and returned to work. 

Jaehyun wasn’t sure what to do. He was still in awe that world famous designer Taeyong just gifted him a suit (one of only two in existence, apparently??) and personally invited him to a private party he was hosting. Jaehyun was used to a certain level of luxury and privilege at this point, but this feels like he’s playing a game with people way out of his league.

“Jesus Christ,” he mumbled under his breath, and rubbed the back of his neck. Well, he has a party to attend on Friday night, he guesses.

~~~~~~

Two days can pass by in the blink of an eye, especially in the city that never sleeps. Friday night rolled around a bit too quickly, but at the same time, not quick enough. Doyoung would be lying if he said that he wasn’t looking forward to dancing and getting just a bit drunk. Surprisingly enough, Jeno agreed to go to the party too as long as he was allowed to bring Jaemin with him. Jaemin was in the same year as Jeno but he was studying dance at Juilliard. They met through mutual friends at some college rager that Jeno refuses to give Doyoung all the details to. Jeno swears on his life that they’re just friends but Doyoung is willing to bet a shiny penny that if there wasn’t anything going on between them, there eventually will be. Jaemin has come over a few times to hang out with Jeno before and judging by the way they look at each other when they think Doyoung isn’t paying attention, something is bound to happen.

Jaemin arrived at around 8:30PM, dressed to the nines in a Chanel jacket over a simple pair of expensive black jeans and a white shirt with a decorative collar. Doyoung could cry. If only Jeno was this into fashion. 

Said boy walked around the corner to greet Jaemin and immediately groaned. “Damn, I’m really underdressed next to both of you,” he said. Jeno was sporting a simple all black outfit, complete with a designer leather jacket that Doyoung had gifted him for Christmas one year. If it were anyone else, Doyoung would be inclined to agree but, once again, Jeno is an exception. He had tried to get him into a Balmain outfit like his own but the other had refused, choosing comfort over looks, as he usually does.

Jaemin laughed and walked up to him and patted his cheeks. “You look fine,” he said, a megawatt smile on his face. It was pretty infectious. 

Doyoung nodded, arms crossed as he looked them both over. “You guys are so cute, it’s gross.”

Jeno rolled his eyes. “Shut up, bro. When are we even supposed to be heading out?” 

“In a few minutes. Things should just be getting started by the time we get to the club and it’s about a 20 minute cab ride.” Doyoung became serious for a moment. “Seriously though, here’s your chance to back out, Jeno. I know it’s not your scene.”

Jeno took one look at Jaemin, the concern etched across the younger boy’s face, and quickly hardened his resolve. “No, I want to. Let’s see how these fancy celebrities party.”

Doyoung patted his head gently and said, “You can leave whenever you want. Just please watch over each other. Unfortunately, these bashes can get pretty crazy. Call me if there’s an emergency.”

Jeno scoffed as he headed for the door. “When was the last time you went to a college party?”

~~~~~~

Simon Says was a high end bar and club tucked away in the lower east side of Manhattan. Doyoung has been there a few times and it’s always been fun. The music was bumping and the drinks were made well. Also, with Taeyong hosting the party, Doyoung knew he didn’t have to spend any money on drinks tonight. Perks of having a rich and generous best friend.

The cab dropped them off in front of the club, it’s fluorescent purple sign a clear beacon in the night. The bouncer let them in and Doyoung knew Taeyong was lying when he said it was a small affair. 

The club itself was bathed in orange and black hues with occasional flashing strobe lights. The DJ was up on the stage doing his thing, dancers hyping up the mass of bodies that were currently moving and grinding on the dance floor, all of them probably already drunk. Others were sitting in private booths or at the bar, chatting amongst themselves. On platforms scattered around the club, go-go dancers shimmied and glided along to the music, each one wearing a different piece from Taeyong’s collection. 

Doyoung turned around and realized that Jeno and Jaemin were no longer behind him. He spotted Jeno’s bleach blond hair making its way over to the bar, Jaemin following closely behind him.  _ They’ll be ok,  _ Doyoung thought,  _ as long as they stick together. _

A waiter came up to him, a tray of champagne flutes on it, each one filled and had a little strawberry on the rim. He handed one to Doyoung. “For the toast,” he said.

Doyoung wasn’t about to turn down champagne but even he didn’t know what the toast was. Luckily he didn’t have to wait long to find out. After the song ended, the music was cut off completely. 

“Ayo, y'all ready for a good time?!” the DJ yelled into the microphone and the crowd responded with enthusiasm. Doyoung began pushing his way closer to the stage. “Alright, alright, y’all know why you’re here, right? If not then you must be living in the past fucking century! We’re here to celebrate one man’s work and dedication and the fruits of his labor! Get the fuck up here, Taeyong!”

There was a shuffle as the crowd cheered and Taeyong bounced onto the stage, a drink in his hand. He looked electrifying, dressed in black skinny pants, a low cut black button down, and one of his own personally designed blazers. On top of his head sat a wide brim hat and he had on snake skin boots. 

He gave the DJ a quick hug before taking the microphone. “Thank you, thank you! Aaaahhh, isn’t this fucking crazy? Oh god, I would like to thank you all for coming tonight and supporting my new collection “NEOzone,” which is hitting the runways for the Spring 2021 fashion week!” He exclaimed and the crowd cheered again, Doyoung joining in this time. “Thank you to my team and my family for putting up with my nonsense and a special thank you to Doyoung, you sweet son of a bitch.” Taeyong pointed directly at him and it’s clear that he was already kind of drunk. How he spotted him in the crowd is beyond Doyoung’s comprehension, and he waved awkwardly as people turned to look at him and cheer. “Thanks for being my best friend. Now,” Taeyong paused, mostly for dramatic effect but also probably because he couldn’t think completely straight at the moment. “Let’s get wild,” he concluded in a low voice and the music immediately kicked back up. Doyoung downed his champagne.

The dancers on the floor began to huddle back together as they moved to the beat. Doyoung just wanted to avoid getting jabbed by elbows or accidentally grinding on someone. He made a beeline for Taeyong, using his hat as a guide. Thankfully, Taeyong saw him approaching and he got his bodyguards to part the dancers like Moses parting the Red Sea. Strangely enough, Yuta wasn’t there.

“Doie, you made it!” Taeyong shouted as he wrapped his arms around Doyoung.

“It’s not like you gave me a choice!” Doyoung laughed as he hugged the other man back. “I’m so happy for you, this collection is going to be a hit!” 

“Oh man, thank you thank you. Now, let's get a drink in you,” Taeyong said, a devious smile on his face.

~~~~~~

Doyoung was man enough to admit that he was a lightweight. It’s one of the reasons why he usually stuck to wines or seltzers. He wasn’t a beer guy (ciders reign supreme), and he wasn’t above a nice cocktail. Unfortunately, this isn’t a sipping wine type of party and Doyoung wasn’t in a seltzer mood. He joined Taeyong and a few other friends for a few shots of tequila (god, he hates shots), before settling comfortably down with palomas. 

He was sipping on his second glass, sitting at the bar as he watched the people around him. Jeno and Jaemin had moved onto the dance floor, looking like little kids having the time of their lives amongst the sea of bodies. Jaemin never took his eyes off of Jeno as they twirled around each other, pulling silly moves and chanting to the music and Doyoung thought it was the cutest thing ever. He loved seeing Jeno have fun and Jaemin was such a sweet kid. It just looked right.

Doyoung was fully engrossed in his cousin’s unfolding love story, until there was suddenly a shuffling in the crowd and the bodies began to part once more, letting the person through. Doyoung will never admit it but he caught his breath when he saw Jaehyun coming towards the bar. 

It was like a Greek god had walked into the club. Dionysus himself has entered the party and around him were the mortals that were ready to fawn over him and Doyoung wouldn’t mind joining in at the moment. Jaehyun was wearing the floral pants from his photo shoot but he paired it with a silk black button down, the top few buttons undone to reveal the beginnings of a smooth, porcelain chest. A few silver chains hung around his neck and rings decorated his fingers. His hair was pushed back like how it was at the photo shoot. Forget Dionysus, this was Thanatos; the god of death himself coming to whisk Doyoung’s stupid ass away to Tartarus. Doyoung wasn’t sure if it was because of the way the lights were dancing off of Jaehyun, or how he stood out from everyone else in the club, or even how when his eyes landed on Doyoung, lips spreading into a devastating grin, but Doyoung was more than ready to go to hell for Jaehyun if it meant that he would keep looking at him like that.

Maybe he was a little more buzzed than he originally believed. Him and Jaehyun locked eyes and neither was willing to look away. Doyoung bit the end of his straw, his posture relaxed as Jaehyun came to stand next to where he was sitting. “Funny seeing you here,” the model said to him, voice just barely audible over the music. Doyoung could just barely smell the alcohol on his breath. Maybe he was seeing everything through rose colored glasses too. 

Doyoung finished his drink and put the glass back on the counter. He turned back to Jaehyun, returning his smile. “As if Taeyong would let me stay home on such an important night,” he said, gesturing for Jaehyun to take the seat next to him. 

The bartender came by. “Want another paloma?” she asked and Doyoung only nodded. The rose colored glasses can stay on for now. “Can I get you anything?” asked the bartender to Jaehyun.

“Bourbon ginger ale on the rocks, please.” As the bartender headed off, Jaehyun turned back to Doyoung. “That doesn’t sound like something Taeyong would do. You guys must be really good friends,” he said as the bartender came back and placed their drinks in front of them. Jaehyun dropped a $20 bill into the bartender’s apron pocket with a wink and Doyoung thought she was going to faint just from Jaehyun looking at her (not that he could blame the poor girl at the moment).

Jaehyun had really nice hands. Doyoung watched as they wrapped around the glass and brought it up to his lips. It wasn’t until then did he notice that Jaehyun’s nails were painted black, the color contrasting beautifully against his skin. He felt his face getting warmer as he brought his own drink up to his lips. What would those hands feel like on him?

“You like to stare, don’t you?” 

If Doyoung was completely sober, he would've been a little embarrassed to be caught staring. But, emboldened by alcohol and the atmosphere of the club, he couldn’t find it in him to be ashamed. He shrugged and tilted his head a little. Oh god, when was the last time he was like this? “Forgive me,” he started, “I just like to admire beauty.”

That seemed to catch Jaehyun off-guard as he went to take another sip. “Beauty?”

Doyoung rolled his eyes at him. “I’m a fashion editor, part of the job is having an eye for beauty. A small portion of the job comes from the clothing but a lot of the work comes from beautiful people like you modeling the clothes.” Doyoung ran his gaze down to Jaehyun’s pants before raising them back up. Jaehyun didn’t miss a second of it. “Speaking of clothes, Taeyong must’ve taken a shine to you if he let you keep that suit.”

Jaehyun managed to look a little sheepish at that. “I told him he didn’t have to.”

“Shut up, it’s a gift. Seeing as how there’s currently only two in existence and you own one of them. Besides, no one else is going to look as good as you do in it,” Doyoung scoffed. 

“Oh, so you do think I look good in these clothes?” Jaehyun asked, a suggestive tone in his voice. 

_ I think you would look better out of those clothes but whatever.  _ “I just like to admire beauty,” he said again. Another sip. He really couldn’t remember the last time he was this bold with someone.

Jaehyun smirked and downed the rest of his drink, placing the glass back down on the bar. “Do you want to dance?”

Doyoung raised an eyebrow at that. “You want to dance with me?” 

“Yep. I think dancing is a great way to release some…” Now it was Jaehyun’s turn to eye Doyoung’s body. “...tension.” 

Jaehyun was like a live wire and Doyoung was tempted to get closer. Taking one last sip of his drink, he left it half finished on the bar before following Jaehyun to the dance floor. Admittedly, Doyoung wasn’t much of a dancer but that didn’t mean he lacked rhythm, especially when he had been drinking. 

The song had slowed down to something lower and sexier, and the lights dimmed even further as a soft piano started playing. They started swaying in front of each other, Jaehyun throwing in some snaps with the beat for fun and Doyoung couldn’t help but laugh. The energy immediately shifted when the bass dropped, the lights suddenly flashing along as the song picked up. Jaehyun shifted closer to him and Doyoung took the chance to put his hands out, feeling Jaehyun’s chest. A small part of him could’ve died happy right there as he saw Jaehyun grin, not moving to take Doyoung’s hands off. His chest felt so sturdy and Doyoung could feel the divets of his muscles as he ran his hands over the silk covered skin. 

He would’ve liked to feel more before Jaehyun suddenly spun him around and pressed up against Doyoung’s back. The shorter man let out a gasp as he felt strong hands on his hips, fingers pressing down firmly. He leaned his head back against Jaehyun’s chest, a hand reaching up to caress the taller man’s neck. His skin was so warm. This all felt like a dream. 

“I wish you could see how you look right now,” Jaehyun whispered into his ear. “This is true beauty.”

That was it, Doyoung had enough. He pulled away and spun around, not giving Jaehyun a chance to respond before Doyoung’s lips were crashing into his. It took Jaehyun a few seconds to respond but eventually, Doyoung felt arms wrap around his waist. He wrapped his own arms around Jaehyun’s neck, deepening the kiss. He opened his mouth to let Jaehyun’s tongue in and Doyoung let out a moan, not caring if Jaehyun heard or not. 

When they finally pulled apart, Jaehyun arched down to pepper kisses on Doyoung’s neck before finally meeting his eyes again. They were so close to each other. Jaehyun smelled amazing, a mix of smoke, alcohol, and some expensive cologne. Doyoung could live in this hazy dream forever. 

“You’re dangerous,” Jaehyun said, his voice low and raspy and Doyoung felt the swipe of a tongue on the shell of his ear. 

He ran his hands through Jaehyun’s hair, the other not seeming to care that Doyoung was messing with his style. “Say that again.”

“You’re so dangerous,” Jaehyun growled out before pulling Doyoung into another kiss.

~~~~~~

Doyoung doesn’t remember what happened after that. Taeyong would be screaming about how much of a cop out that is and how Doyoung didn’t even have a lot to drink but it was true. It felt like the rest of the night passed by through a filter. He only really remembers dancing with Jaehyun and them kissing and then dancing some more. Unfortunately this would come back to bite him in the ass. 

He woke up to bright sunlight streaming into his bedroom. He gets up slowly, eyes struggling to open completely. He didn’t feel hungover but he was nursing a massive headache. Time to not drink again for a month. He sat up and looked around. He was definitely in his own room, judging by the dark blue curtains and the photo of him and Jeno sitting on the nightstand. The clock next to it read 11AM.  _ Saturday morning. _

“Jesus Christ, how did I even get home?” he asked himself quietly. Groaning, he ran a hand through his hair. He was still in last night’s shirt but had somehow managed to take off his shoes and strip down to his boxers before climbing into bed, a tell-tale trail leading from the bedroom door to where he currently was. Ok, so he wasn’t  _ that  _ drunk last night. His mouth was so dry though. 

Digging around the sheets and comforter, he managed to locate his phone, the battery almost dead from not having been charged. But that wasn’t what concerned him. He had three messages from Jungwoo, a fuck ton from Taeyong (why was he up at this ungodly hour after a night like that), and two messages from a new number. There were also several notifications on Twitter and they just kept coming in.

This was never a good thing. With his headache growing, Doyoung began to go through his messages. Jungwoo texted him at 9AM.

**JW: seems like you had fun last night**

**JW: you need to see the twitter trending page**

**JW: try not to have a heart attack please**

The whole world fell silent as Doyoung immediately scrolled to his Twitter app. The trending page, for the most part, was filled with its usual nonsense: politics, viral news, celebrity gossip and--

“Vogue editor Doyoung Kim spotted locking lips with up and coming model and singer, Jaehyun Jung,” he read out loud. Clicking on it, he was bombarded with pictures of himself and Jaehyun making out at the party along with an article posted by a popular gossip site. If Doyoung wasn’t incredibly mortified about being exposed like this, he would’ve thought the pictures were kind of hot. But yet he felt like he was about to throw up and he didn’t have the guts to read the actual article or look at any of the comments.

He went back to his messages. Taeyong got to him about 45 minutes ago.

**TY: DOYOUNG WTF**

**TY: damn kid, you stole my thunder**

**TY: gotta say im impressed though, you work fast (im not actually mad at you)**

**TY: CALL ME WHEN YOU GET UP**

**TY: I WANT ALL THE DETAILS**

**TY: you guys didn’t fuck in the club did you?**

**TY: dOYoUnG**

**TY: Im weirdly proud of you tbh**

Doyoung rubbed his eyes roughly. He didn’t have the energy for this. He finally got to the last two messages.

**3:47AM**

**(?): hey it’s jaehyun. You gave me your number before you left lol**

**10:15AM**

**(?): shit, it looks like we made the headlines**

Doyoung wanted to scream. Of course, he did the next irrational thing and immediately booked it out of his room and rushed down the hall to Jeno’s.

“JENO, SOS!” he shouted as he threw the door open and immediately regretted it. Jeno shot up out of bed, the only thing he had on were a small pair of boxers. Meanwhile, Jaemin, who looked more than a little naked, groggily got up from where it looked like he was sleeping, cuddled up next to Jeno. Seol, poor thing, ran out of the room into the safety of the hall.

“DUDE, WHAT THE FUCK,” Jeno shouted back and whipped a pillow at Doyoung and it nearly hit him had he not dodged in time. 

“Jesus Christ,” Jaemin grumbled before hiding himself under the comforter. 

“I’M SORRY!” Doyoung yelled at the top of his lungs. “BUT BOTH OF YOU! BREAKFAST TABLE. NOW!” And with that, Doyoung ran out and slammed the door behind him.

It took the boys about 15 minutes to put themselves together and put on some sort of clothing. When they finally came out of Jeno’s room, they were met with an anxious Doyoung sitting at the kitchen island. His hands were folded in front of him and his eyes were staring straight ahead as Jaemin and Jeno sat down next to him. 

There was a long silence before Jeno sighed. “So, care to tell me what the fuck that was about?” he asked. Jeno very rarely got angry with Doyoung but the younger man was currently hungover and tired and wanted to go back to bed. Jaemin sighed, petting a anxious Seol in his lap.

Doyoung didn’t respond. He quietly unlocked his phone and pulled up the article for Jeno to read. Jeno took the phone and Doyoung watched as his eyes scanned the screen, Jaemin peaking over from the side. Jeno looked at Doyoung, completely unimpressed with what he was being shown. “You’re freaking out over this? Don’t you think you’re overreacting?” 

Doyoung was about to slam his face against the counter. “You’re missing the point, Jeno,” he groaned. “I’m not going to hear the end of this from the media or from the people I work with. Privacy was already kind of hard to come by with my job, but now that I’m affiliated with a star of this caliber, people are going to want answers.”

At that, Jeno looked concerned. Strangely enough, his first response was to glance over at Jaemin who, bless him, looked every bit as confused as he should be.Turning back to Doyoung, Jeno began as calmly as he could, “Look, you don’t know what’s going to happen. This’ll probably blow over by Monday. Gossip doesn’t last long if you don’t feed it.” Doyoung nodded. That did make sense. “As long as the cameras didn’t catch you guys doing anything more than this, I think the media coverage will die down. Trust me. There’s always something crazier going on in the world than two men making out in a club.”

Doyoung was in awe. Jeno was all grown up. “Since when did you become so wise, my child?” he asked.

Jeno remained unimpressed. “Shut up,” he said. “Since you came into my room screaming, you’re making breakfast. Or lunch. I don’t even know what time it is right now,” he said, rubbing his eyes. Jaemin patted his hair gently. 

“Fine fine, I’ll fix up brunch, but that means you’re making dinner,” Doyoung said, before getting up.

“Or I could just start ANOTHER viral rumor about you”

“I’ll poison your avocado toast. Jaemin?” Doyoung asked and the young man looked up, exhausted and completely done with both him and Jeno at the moment. Doyoung knew a quick cure for that. “Coffee or a mimosa?” 

Jaemin perked up a little at that.

~~~~~~

  
  



	2. We Got the Vibe, We Got the Juice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Doyoung needs to be more honest with himself.

After a rather eventful morning and a filling brunch, Doyoung finally got the chance to sit down and call Taeyong...

And then immediately regret his decisions because Taeyong wanted to meet in person. Apparently, talking things out over the phone didn’t cut it this time. Fortunately, Taeyong was willing to come out and meet him at his apartment. And that is how Doyoung found himself sitting across from Taeyong out on his large balcony, overlooking Williamsburg as the two of them sipped sweet wine. It was warm out, the last dreads of winter finally leaving and Doyoung was more than happy about that. He hated the cold and the snow so much, he considered moving west but in his heart, he knew he couldn’t leave the east coast. It was home. 

Both men had their sunglasses on and were dressed casually for once. Doyoung had on a basic long sleeve and track pants, while Taeyong wore a pair of black jeans and a white T-shirt. It was a rare sight to behold but Doyoung didn’t miss the dark circles under his eyes when Taeyong arrived this morning, knowing that he probably didn’t fall asleep until about five or six in the morning. Yuta was inside, keeping Seol company since Jeno and Jaemin left for the day.

“Don’t you think it’s kinda sad?” Doyoung asked. “How our lives just mainly consists of us working and drinking?”

Taeyong scoffed. “The day you start questioning that is the day you realize you might need a boyfriend.”

Doyoung frowned. “Shut up, I don’t need a boyfriend,” he grumbled.

Taeyong rolled his whole head at Doyoung and said, “Last night begs to differ. Which, please spill the tea, is Jaehyun a good kisser?”

Doyoung actually had to think about that. He doesn’t remember much and he doesn’t trust his judgement, especially on so much tequila. But he does remember soft lips against his own, and strong, firm hands on his waist. 

“Ok. Yes, he was,” Doyoung finally said. “Or is. Whatever, I don’t know.” He thought about it for a moment. “I really don’t know. When was the last time I found someone attractive enough to make out with them in a bar?”

“Not since college, probably.”

“Exactly. So this is all very strange. Also, apparently I gave him my phone number last night??” Doyoung said, taking a sip to calm himself down. He needed to stop getting so worked up over this tiny detail.

Taeyong pursed his lips and nodded. “That you did. Are you going to answer him back?”

Doyoung shrugged. “I don’t know,” he repeated. “I feel like I should though since this does involve him.”

“Maybe it’ll be in your best interest to contact him. I’m saying this so that you can get some closure and say your good-byes if you want to. You never have to see him or speak to him again after that.”

“But… what if I do want to see him again after that?” Doyoung said softly.

Taeyong looked incredulous. “Who are you and what have you done to Doyoung?” he exclaimed. 

“I’m trying to be vulnerable here and share my feelings and shit,” Doyoung said, swatting at Taeyong. “Honestly though. Maybe it was the liquor getting to me or maybe I am getting a bit soft in the head, but you know when you something just feels right? That’s what it felt like to be so close to Jaehyun. Like every nerve ending in my body wanted to be as close to him as possible. When we kissed-- Jesus Christ, I haven’t felt that alive in a while.”

Taeyong was quiet for a brief second before saying, “I think you’re getting soft in the head.”

Doyoung groaned and downed his wine. “Remind me never to spill my guts to you ever again.”

The older man laughed and Doyoung was once again hit with the fact that he couldn’t stay mad at Taeyong for very long. “Relax, Doie. I get it, we’ve all been there.” Taeyong sighed. “Listen, if you want to keep seeing him for whatever reason, it’s within your power to do so. Maybe this’ll help you work out your feelings towards him.”

“I’m not even sure what my feelings towards him are or what to do.”

“There’s only three real options,” Taeyong said, holding up three fingers and listing them off. “You either talk things out and then never speak to him again, you talk things out and sleep with him because Lord knows you’re frustrated and the attraction is mutual, or you talk to him and go on a date with him. It’s mathematics, love.”

Doyoung looked at him like he was an idiot. “I think I have more than those three options.” 

Taeyong returned the look ten-fold. “I don’t see you taking any action at all.”

Doyoung groaned. Why was he friends with the most extra person in the tri-state area? “Still though, there’s currently a media frenzy around both of us now and it’ll only get worse as he becomes more popular. It’ll take a while for this to die down,” he said. He bit his lip in thought. “I just don’t feel like getting harrassed, or worse, have something happen to Jeno should this not end anytime soon.”

Taeyong looked thoughtful for a second before the lightbulb above his head turned on. “Ever thought about getting a bodyguard?”

Doyoung looked confused. “Not necessarily…” he said unsurely. “Don’t see how one would help in this situation.” 

“Doyoung, think about it. You’ll have protection from the media and paparazzi for as long as you need and it extends to Jeno. You have the money for it and you can send them away whenever you want.”

Doyoung stole a glance back into the living room. Yuta was sitting on the couch, back straighter than a board with Seol on his lap, eyes fixated on the television.  _ Such a strange man _ . Turning back to Taeyong, he says, “You make a valid point. Still, I’m not sure.”

“Well, how about this. I’ll give you the contact info for the agency that Yuta works with and you talk things out with them. Maybe they’ll convince you.” Taeyong whipped out his phone and quickly began tapping away. “Besides, the bodyguard just has to follow your schedule. It’s not like they need to live with you.”

Doyoung raised an eyebrow at that. “Doesn’t Yuta live with you?” he asked.

“He basically lives in the second floor of my townhouse,” Taeyong said, waving it off as if it were information that everybody knew. “I have enough space so I figured that he might like something bigger than one room. Don’t get it twisted, he can leave whenever he wants after his shift is over but he’s been slowly moving his things in as ‘to make his job easier,’” he finished, air quotes and all.

Doyoung fell silent. A bodyguard wouldn’t be a bad idea, even if it was only going to be for a week or two. It’s to guarantee his safety along with Jeno’s. Knowing how careful Taeyong can be, the agency would have all of these people vetted and background checked before sending them into people’s homes. He shrugged. It won’t hurt to check it out.

“I’ll have Jungwoo set up an appointment with them on Monday,” he said with a sigh. Going back to work was going to be rough. “We’ll see what happens.”

Taeyong hummed before looking pointedly back at Doyoung. “You’re forgetting something?”

Doyoung groaned. Right. Jaehyun. “Do I really have to?” he asked, pouting just a bit at Taeyong who gagged at the sight. 

“Do that again and I’ll fight you,” he said. “And yes, Doyoung, you have to do it now. Otherwise you’ll overthink it and then not do it at all and then you’re going to call me and complain about how you wished you would’ve taken the opportunity and I’m going to tell you that that sucks but who told you to text him back earlier? Oh, that’s right, me.” 

Doyoung wanted to smack him. And so he did, reaching over and hitting Taeyong on the shoulder. 

Although Taeyong was less prone to violence, he also had an immense stubborn streak so, instinctively, he hit Doyoung back. A few swats and pushing later, the two men found themselves standing, trading light pushes and punches, almost positive that they were being watched from the neighboring apartments. Despite Taeyong actually landing a solid hit or two, Doyoung couldn’t help but laugh. It reminded him of the good old college days where him and Taeyong were still nobodies and would bicker over the dumbest things. It was all love in the end. 

He managed to get Taeyong in a headlock when he heard the door to the balcony open and a rushed voice shout, “Taeyong!” Yuta jogged out and looked ready to pry Doyoung off of his boss at all costs until Taeyong held a hand up and gave him an easy smile.

“It’s all good, Yuta. Doyoung and I have been doing this for a while. He’s just mad that I called him out on his bullshit.”

At that, Doyoung pinched Taeyong’s side and watched triumphantly as the older doubled over further in discomfort. Laughing, he loosened his grip. Meanwhile, Yuta still didn’t look entirely comfortable but he relaxed a bit.

“Alright then,” Taeyong huffed. He straightened his shir and put his sunglasses back on. “Now that that’s out of your system, text Jaehyun back.”

Doyoung sighed one final time. “Fine, fine. This feels like a bad idea though.” 

Taeyong just gave him a grin before making a beeline back to his seat and his wine glass. Yuta maneuvered around quietly to check on him. Doyoung can only hope that if he does get a bodyguard, they would be just as attentive. But that was a worry for another day. 

Grabbing his phone from his pocket, he tapped around for Jaehyun’s number, the other man’s message left on read.  _ Looks like we made the headlines.  _ What does he even say without sounding awkward?

**DY: i guess we did lol**

Such a simple sentence and yet it made Doyoung want to jump off the roof of his building. He hated sounding unsure or insecure, even through text message. Of course, there was no way Jaehyun would be able to tell that just by reading a text but it’s the principle of the matter. Doyoung didn’t know why he was this nervous, it wasn’t the first time he was involved in a dumb scandal. But for some reason, this felt like an entirely different game. Jaehyun was an entirely different being. Maybe it’s because Doyoung actually felt something when they kissed or maybe--

His phone buzzed. That was fast. 

**JH: are you alright?**

Doyoung wasn’t expecting that response. Was he actually “alright”? If he were being dramatically honest, no. He didn’t like the attention that being with Jaehyun had gotten him but it wasn’t the end of the world either.

**DY: Yeah. Im just not sure how to react or go about this.**

**JH: Want to meet and talk it out?**

What he replied next with could either make the situation better or worse. He looked towards Taeyong, a panicked expression in his eyes. “He’s asking if I want to meet and talk things out with him. What do I say?”

Taeyong shrugged. “You’re an adult, Doyoung, say whatever you want,” he said, not even sparing a glance at Doyoung.

Doyoung rolled his eyes and turned back to his phone. He let out a heavy sigh as he weighed his options. Then it suddenly hit him. 

Why was this bothering him so much? He’s been a part of weird minor scandals before. Sure, he doesn’t like the attention but gossip always dies eventually. This too shall pass. This wasn’t anything Doyoung couldn’t handle. He just had to mentally treat this situation like it was another day in the office: keep a level head, stay focused, and solve the problem. He was a boss bitch, as Jungwoo lovingly calls him once in a while. This was nothing. 

**DY: sure.**

**JH: Cool. When do you have some free time?**

**DY: Free time doesn’t exist lol**

**DY: I’ll let you know when im available**

Doyoung was only being honest. He really didn’t know when he would be able to see the other man again, especially with his schedule. Next week is going to be packed with meetings as the magazine begins work on the new issue. He’d be distracted, and his itinerary would be full so he won’t have any time to think about Jaehyun or his lips for a while. 

His phone buzzed again. 

**JH: what about tomorrow? It’s a sunday.**

Fuck. Doyoung forgot it was a weekend. So much for having control of the situation. Well now, his options were to bite the bullet now and get it over with or meet later in the week and possibly reignite the story again at a later date. He bit his lip. For a brief moment, Doyoung thought about asking Taeyong for his opinion but, turning to said man, he realized he would only get the same useless response from him.  _ You’re an adult, do what you want.  _ (Also, Taeyong and Yuta seemed to be having an in depth discussion and Yuta was looking at Taeyong with stars in his eyes. Doyoung wasn’t about to interrupt that.)

His thumbs ghosted over the phone. Fuck it, he thought, he could do whatever he wanted. Doyoung quickly typed out a response before stuffing the device back into his pocket. He didn’t want to see what Jaehyun was going to say. He picked up his wine glass off the table and began making a beeline for the doors leading back into the apartment. 

“I’m assuming things went well, Doie?” Taeyong called after him. Doyoung turned around and saw a knowing smile on his face. Taeyong was definitely some type of psychic. Either that, or he was just super in tune with Doyoung’s emotions and thoughts. The longer Doyoung stayed quiet, the wider Taeyong’s smile got. Even Yuta was unsettled. 

Doyoung exhaled loudly. “You know you’ll eventually hear all about it from me. Right now though, I don’t want to talk about it.” And with that, Doyoung headed inside his home.

“Oh! Can I get a refill?” Taeyong exclaimed, waving around his empty wine glass.

“Get it yourself.”

~~~~~~

Jaehyun set his phone down after sending his last text to Doyoung. Sunlight streamed in through the big windows of his apartment, reflecting off his kitchen bar. It was currently doubling as a dining table, a plate of half finished lunch in front of him. Across from him, Johnny sat and flipped through the  _ Times _ , a cup of coffee in his free hand. The other had crashed at Jaehyun’s place after the party. He won’t lie, he did feel a little guilty about leaving Johnny alone at the party for most of the night, despite the other man saying it was ok because at least Jaehyun was ‘getting some.’ 

Jaehyun’s mind wandered back to the night before as he sipped his own coffee. He had been to his fair share of parties ever since moving to Manhattan a few months back, but never one to that magnitude. He was surrounded by famous faces and for the first time, he almost felt like he belonged amongst them. Supermodels, actors, music producers, fashion designers, and critics, along with the creme de la creme of New York’s high society were there. Somewhere in that mix, Jaehyun just barely fit in, like an awkward puzzle piece. He was nowhere near the same level as anyone else in that club but maybe one day. 

He also couldn’t honestly say he regretted the events of the night. Sure, he was embarrassed about having his face plastered all over gossip sites and social media (Jaehyun is so surprised that his mom hasn’t called him about it yet), but did he regret kissing Doyoung under the flashing lights of the club and forgetting that they were surrounded by other people even if it were just for a moment? Not at all. How could he? He remembered how well they fit together, how warm Doyoung was against him, and the way his fingers threaded through Jaehyun’s hair, pulling just enough so Jaehyun could feel it. It was a controlled move, oozing dominating energy. 

That much was obvious about Doyoung even when they first met. There was a reserved nature to the other man, as if no one could ever get past the first couple of layers and see his true personality. Jaehyun might not know a lot about anything in general, but he’s been in this business long enough to learn how to read people. Doyoung was an enigma with an attitude, and Jaehyun can assume that only a select few people have access to whoever he really is. The Doyoung that wasn’t cloaked in professionalism or hazy from having too many drinks. Was he any different from all the other rich fucks in this city? 

“Want to tell me what you’re daydreaming about?” 

Jaehyun looked up at the comment and met eyes with Johnny. The other man was looking at him with an amused expression, his newspaper long forgotten on the table in front of him. His lips were pursed as he lifted the coffee cup back up to his lips.

“Did Doyoung agree to come and meet you?” Johnny asked before taking a sip. 

Jaehyun nodded, trying his best to seem collected. “Yeah, we’re just trying to find time. Apparently he’s way too busy,” he said, fiddling with his phone. 

Johnny hummed. “Well just look at what he does for a living, can you blame him for being busy?” 

“I guess,” Jaehyun mumbled. There was a comfortable silence between the two men before Jaehyun suddenly looked back up at Johnny. “Have you worked with him before?”

“Doyoung? Yeah, we’ve collaborated a few times. He says he trusts me to take photos more than most other photographers.” Another sip. “Why?” Johnny asked suspiciously.

Jaehyun frowned and shook his head. “Can’t I ask simple questions? I just wanted to know what he’s like.”

Johnny looked thoughtful for a minute before saying, “I personally really like Doyoung. He’s a bit uptight but if you need a job done well and done right, he’s your man. I don’t really see him outside of work often but I can only assume he’s a bit looser when he’s not in editor mode.” He gave a pointed look to Jaehyun and wiggled his brows. “But you seemed to have really loosened him up last night.”

Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “I can’t stand you.”

Johnny laughed, a bright and cheerful sound coming from his chest. For someone who was pissed drunk last night, he sure is handling his hangover pretty well. “In all seriousness though,” he says once he calms down. “If you’re really determined to shoot your shot with Doyoung, prepare to be patient. If the tabloids are correct, he hasn’t been seen in any kind of intimate relationship for a very long time and I think he likes staying lowkey.”

If that were the case, Jaehyun couldn’t really blame him. “Jesus Christ, everybody knows everything about everyone here, don’t they?”

Johnny smiled, looking almost pitifully at his best friend. “You’re in the city that never sleeps now, Jae. All people do is talk.”

~~~~~~

What the fuck was Doyoung doing? He’s been asking himself that since he woke up on Sunday morning. He refused to tell Jeno what his plans for the day were, only letting him know that he might be out a bit late. Jeno didn’t seem bothered by it at all. 

He asked himself what the fuck he was doing as he sat at home, watching movies, reading, and then making supper for Jeno until it was time to head out. He asked himself the same question again as he got into his car at around 4PM and drove over the bridge into Manhattan. And here he was asking himself what the fuck he was doing as he sat in the garage of Jaehyun’s apartment building. 

He lived in an understated looking building in Soho but Doyoung was willing to bet a pretty penny that the inside looked amazing compared to the outside. If Doyoung wasn’t so put off by the noise of Manhattan, he wouldn’t mind having an apartment in Soho. The buildings were old and they held a certain charm in the way that they were all different colors and didn’t seem to fit together. It was abstract and silly but Doyoung found it very pretty. 

With one last sigh, he stepped out of his car and locked the door. For his own sake, he decided to dress down for this, donning a slim pair of black pants and a brown sweater with black tennis shoes. He had a private ritual of never dressing up on Sundays unless he absolutely had to and he wasn’t about to break tradition for a stranger, no matter how handsome they might be. 

The entire trip up to Jaehyun’s floor was nerve wracking. Doyoung was damn near close to turning around when Jaehyun buzzed him into the building, already feeling embarrassed enough for the both of them.  _ You have to see this through. YOU are the reason why you’re here. If you turn back now, you might regret it later. _

When he finally made it to Jaehyun’s door, Doyoung knocked quickly and immediately regretted it. Maybe he should’ve given himself a better pep talk. At least he was right about one thing though; the building was a lot nicer on the inside. 

There was a muffled “coming!” before the locks on the door clicked and there was Jaehyun. The first thing Doyoung noticed was the spatula in his free hand and then his eyes drifted down to the polka dotted waist apron tied around him. Jaehyun flushed, looking a bit sheepish. “I thought you would be here a bit later,” he chuckled. “Come on in, I’m just fixing dinner.”

Doyoung smiled gratefully and stepped over the threshold. Nudging his shoes off, the first thing he noticed was the music playing in the background. It was a soft rock song and it sounded like something he’s heard before. “I hope you don’t mind The 1975,” Jaehyun said as he led Doyoung further into the apartment. “I like listening to music when I cook.”

Doyoung gave him a reassuring smile. “Me too,” he said softly. He looked around the apartment and was surprised to find how clean it was, but then again, Jaehyun didn’t seem like the type of person to like messes anyway. The apartment was industrial but decorated comfortably, soft brown leather furniture lining exposed brick walls. Warm lights hung from wood beams in the ceiling and books lined multiple shelves in the living. In the corner was a baby grand piano. Several papers laid on top of it with words and notes scribbled all over. Was he working on a song?

“Doyoung?”

“Oh!” Jesus, how long was he zoned out for? “I’m sorry, I was just looking around.” 

Jaehyun shook his head and smiled softly. He had two wine glasses in his hand. “It’s fine. Do you have a wine preference?”

He really shouldn’t be drinking anything other than water but wine sounded good for his nerves right about now. “Rose if you have any.” 

“Coming right up. Follow me, dinner is almost ready.”

It was only then did it strike Doyoung that Jaehyun meant that he made dinner for Doyoung as well. “Oh Jaehyun, you didn’t have to make dinner!” he exclaimed as he followed Jaehyun into the kitchen and dining room. It had the same warm, cozy feel to it. The cabinets were all made of polished dark wood which offset the stainless steel appliances.

“Well, my mom told me that you should always serve your guest a meal if it’s their first time in your home,” Jaehyun said, his tone final as he handed Doyoung a full glass of wine. “Besides, the downside of living alone is that I always make too much food for one person. I probably should’ve asked you if you were allergic to anything ahead of time though.”

“No, no, it’s ok!” Doyoung said quickly, his wine sloshing around in the glass. “It’s fine, I just wasn’t expecting dinner. I kind of thought we were only going to have drinks and talk.”  _ Damn, and he went out of his way to make food for you. _

Jaehyun didn’t seem angry at that but Doyoung didn’t miss the flash of disappointment in the other man’s eyes. He watched as Jaehyun leaned back against the counter. “We can, if that’s what you’d like,” he said, a small smile on his face but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“No!” Doyoung exclaimed again and Jaehyun was taken aback. “No. Let’s eat. The easiest way to talk is over good food.” 

Jaehyun seemed surprised before he sighed and shook his head.  _ Oh, now you’ve done it, Doyoung.  _ For some reason, the idea of making Jaehyun upset made Doyoung extremely disappointed with himself. His worries were cut short though when Jaehyun looked back up at him, his arms crossed and stance casual and Doyoung couldn’t help but think back to when he first saw Jaehyun on set. He just seemed so cool (even if the apron on) but then there was also this weirder, shy side of him. 

Jaehyun gestured over to the bar where two place mats and utensils were waiting. “Take a seat. I hope you like pasta,” he said, the smile finally reaching his eyes and Doyoung felt like he could breathe properly again. 

~~~~~~

Ok. So Jaehyun can cook as well. How was this man not married yet? Or at least spoken for??

Jaehyun gave him a hearty plate full of spaghetti noodles in a rich carbonara sauce with peas, prosciutto, and mushrooms. Grated parmesan and warm Italian bread topped it all off and Doyoung couldn’t remember the last time he had a home cooked meal like this. 

They made small talk and Doyoung was almost hoping that they wouldn’t actually get to the real reason why he was here. Jaehyun told him that he just moved to Manhattan a few months ago and is still having trouble adjusting. Doyoung agreed with him. When he first moved to the city, it took Doyoung about a year to completely adjust and even now, there were still parts of it that he couldn’t stand. Only when he got his home in Brooklyn did he really get comfortable. 

Jaehyun was easy to talk to. He mostly spoke about his family and work and Doyoung found himself getting lost once or twice in the conversation, choosing instead to just listen to Jaehyun’s voice. 

Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end and Doyoung knew the exact moment when the energy shifted. Jaehyun had taken a sip of his wine before clearing his throat and looking directly at the other man. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to eat before this because Doyoung already felt sick. 

“I’m sorry.”

Well, Doyoung wasn’t expecting that and he was pretty sure it showed on his face. “Wha- why?” 

Jaehyun didn’t break eye contact with him but his pointer finger began lightly tapping on the counter. His nails were still painted. “For throwing you into the spotlight like this.” He paused. “And for kissing you,” he finished softly.

Doyoung felt the blush crawl up his face. The wine didn’t help either. “If that’s the case then I should be apologizing to you,” he said, letting out a nervous laugh. It really struck him then that he didn’t actually know Jaehyun at all, and the realization made this all the more awkward. He was just a random man that Doyoung had worked with once and then made out in a club with two days later, but yet, here they were having a strangely intimate dinner. “I was the one who grabbed you after all.” 

Jaehyun moved to rub the back of his neck, finally looking away. He had a lot of physical ticks, Doyoung noticed. “It’s alright,” Jaehyun said, with an easy smile. “I just hope I didn’t cause too many problems for you.”

Doyoung waved his hand at that. “Please, this isn’t the first time I’ve been involved in gossip. The worst problem this caused me so far was with Jeno.” 

“Jeno?”

Doyoung laughed, choosing not to acknowledge the concern that laced Jaehyun’s voice. “My cousin, Jeno. He lives with me in Brooklyn and he was at the party with us. When the news broke yesterday morning, I might’ve panicked just a tiny bit,” Doyoung said, squeezing his thumb and pointer finger close together. “I ran into his room and woke him up but I had forgotten that his ‘friend’ had crashed at our place after the party. Needless to say, I rightfully had a pillow thrown at me.” Doyoung laughed at the image of an angry Jeno. He didn’t like making the younger man upset but on certain occasions, it was funny to look back on those moments and laugh. 

Jaehyun chuckled at the story and Doyoung was beginning to feel comfortable again. “He’ll never forgive you for that,” Jaehyun said. 

“Well, seeing as how I’m not charging him rent to live with me, he’s going to have to learn,” Doyoung said with a huff. Jaehyun laughed again and the dimples reappeared on his face. He really was beautiful.

They fell into a silence, neither one knowing what to say next. It seemed to stretch on between them before Jaehyun quietly asked, “Do you regret it?” 

Doyoung stared down at his empty plate as he wrung his hands in his lap. He didn’t need to ask what Jaehyun was referring to. Maybe he should be honest. There was no point in lying and it’s not like he can feel more awkward than he already does. He took a deep breath. “No, not at all. I hate the attention that it brought on me but I can’t say I regret what we did.”

Jaehyun’s shoulders sagged a little at that, as if he were releasing a breath that he had been holding all evening. “So,” he sounded unsure. “Where do we go from here?”

Doyoung shook his head. “I don’t know. I barely know you but whatever we decide, we need to think about our public image. For the sake of our careers.”

“We could always get to know each other.” 

Doyoung felt bad, he really did but he had to think of himself first in this situation. “I don’t know if that’s the best idea.” 

Jaehyun sighed. “I’m not asking you to marry me, Doyoung. We might even be able to be friends, you know,” he said.

“I don’t want to be your friend, I want to kiss your neck.”

It came out before Doyoung was able to stop it. If he wasn't blushing beforehand, he definitely was now. Jaehyun looked at him with wide eyes and an amused smile on his face. Doyoung wanted to die. 

“Did you- did you just quote The 1975 at me?” 

Doyoung rubbed his face. “Excuse me, do you have a window I can jump out of?” he groaned into his palms. Jaehyun laughed, a cheerful sound that Doyoung wanted to keep hearing, just not at the expense of his pride. 

“Hey now, it’s ok. Casual Doyoung is much more different than I was expecting,” Jaehyun said casually.

“What do you mean?” 

Jaehyun shrugged but the smile remained and his eyes were crinkled into happy crescent moons. “When we first met, you seemed so professional and uptight. At the party, I think the alcohol loosened you up-”

“It definitely did.”

“-and so I didn’t really know what to expect from you tonight.” He looked back down at his hands before continuing. “I am serious when I say that I want to get to know you. Whether that be as friends or something else, those are my intentions.”

Doyoung was caught off guard. Very rarely has he met people who were so upfront and wore their heart on their sleeve like Jaehyun. It was refreshing, honestly. 

“I won’t make any promises to you,and that’s the truth. But if you want to try and get to know me, then go for it.” 

“You make it sound like a daunting task,” Jaehyun scoffed.

“Some people might say it is.”

Jaehyun cocked his head at him. “We’ll just have to see.”

They both had a good laugh at that. Maybe they were both expecting this night to go a lot worse than it actually did. Maybe, Doyoung thinks, this was a sign that they should take things slowly. 

~~~~~~

“Do you want to do this again at some point?” Jaehyun asked. They were standing in the narrow entry way of the apartment as Doyoung slipped his shoes back. They ended up talking for a bit longer before Jaehyun began to clear the dishes away. Doyoung had tried to help but the younger man had refused to let him anywhere near the kitchen sink, stating that as a guest, Doyoung had to remain seated and finish his wine.

Doyoung looked at him thoughtfully. Jaehyun stood across from him, leaning against the wall, tall and handsome despite dressing as casually as Doyoung was. “That… sounds nice, to be honest. Thank you for making dinner.”

“Thank  _ you  _ for coming over. I realize this must’ve been a bit uncomfortable for you. You can decide the time and place next time,” Jaehyun told him with a grin. 

Doyoung couldn’t help but return the smile. “I’d like that,” he said softly. He held out a hand, his way of extending the olive branch. “Possible friends?” he asked. 

Jaehyun chuckled. “Best possible friends,” he responds, shaking Doyoung’s hand. 

It was strange. Neither one of them immediately let go of the other’s hand. Doyoung was too enthralled by how their hands fit together and the fact that Jaehyun’s hand was so soft despite the calluses on his palm. They were definitely piano player hands: sturdy but graceful and able to create beautiful music probably. Doyoung looked up and locked eyes with Jaehyun. The latter was staring at him intensely. 

“What’s wrong?” Doyoung asked.

“You haven’t let go of my hand yet.”

At that, Doyoung went to pull his hand back but was stilled by the feeling of Jaehyun’s fingers gently squeezing around his own. Jaehyun took a step closer and Doyoung was beginning to feel breathless. He swallowed. “Do possible friends kiss each other?” he asked. 

Jaehyun tilted his head to the side and grinned. (Doyoung was getting sick of all of his smiling already.) “Do you want to kiss me?” Jaehyun asked back. 

“Maybe,” Doyoung breathed. “You?”

“Yes.” 

That was all Doyoung needed to know before pulling Jaehyun down. Their lips met in a softer kiss than the one shared on the dance floor. This felt less desperate, more intentional, and so much sweeter. 

Maybe, maybe, maybe. Doyoung’s been saying that a lot to himself lately. Maybe he should be more honest with himself and with his emotions. Maybe giving Jaehyun a chance wasn’t such a bad idea. Maybe he should actually listen to his own advice and take this slowly.

He couldn’t think about that last one at the moment though. His mind went blank when Jaehyun lightly bit his bottom lip. Maybe he could just stop thinking for a bit.

~~~~~~

It was a little past 10PM by the time Doyoung got home. He didn’t want to leave Jaehyun’s place but he also had work in the morning and he needed all the sleep he could get if he was going to deal with the nonsense that this week was going to bring. What he wasn’t expecting was for Jeno to still be awake and doing homework at the kitchen island.

“Look who’s finally home,” Jeno said sarcastically as Doyoung closed the door behind him. Seol was resting on the island in front of Jeno and Doyoung sighed. He loved Seol but he doesn’t like having her sleeping where they ate their meals. That was a problem for Jeno to deal with though. 

“I told you I was going to be out late,” Doyoung said. 

“Where were you?” Jeno asked. 

Doyoung shrugged. “I went out to dinner with a friend and we committed a sinful act,” he said, smirking at the confused look on his cousin’s face. “I’m off to bed. Make sure you disinfect the island when you’re done.” With that, he wandered off to his room and shut the door after calling out a cheery ‘goodnight!’

Back at the island, Jeno scratched behind Seol’s ears, his brows furrowed as he stared at Doyoung’s bedroom door. “What do you think, Seol? Do you think he finally got laid?” he asked the cat. 

Seol just looked up at him and meowed. 

Jeno nodded. “Yeah, I think so too.”

~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you think! x   
> -R


	3. Sincerity is Scary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Doyoung goes through some much needed introspection at the weirdest times.

When Doyoung was considering getting a bodyguard, he had an image in his head about what they would possibly look like. He imagined someone slim and strong like Yuta. Or the complete opposite. Maybe someone dashing and buff? He wasn’t sure, all he knew for a fact was that the man sitting in front of him wasn’t what immediately came to mind at first. 

It was a rainy Tuesday and the agency that Taeyong gave him information to had immediately contacted Jungwoo back after he called them yesterday. Apparently, Doyoung was considered a “high profile” client so they were quick to respond. Jungwoo gave them the run down on the situation along with a short list of personal requirements from Doyoung himself and the agency said they would send someone out the very next day. 

And that’s where Doyoung found himself at the moment. The man sitting across from him in his office was a bit shorter than him with a slight build but Doyoung could tell he had some muscle to him. (“Don’t judge a book by its cover,” Jungwoo had said. “Keep in mind what his job is, he could still kick your ass.”) He was wearing khakis and a black polo shirt with the agency’s logo on it and Doyoung felt his soul cringe a little. No one looks good in khakis, but a uniform is a uniform. The stranger had a short black undercut and he was actually really handsome once you ignore the khakis. His face was all sharp, sculpted lines and when he smiled, he showed off a set of straight, pearly white teeth and his eyes crinkled into pretty half moons.

Doyoung briefly looked through the documents the agency sent him, which included a resume, profile, background check, drug test, and a few other legal documents.  _ Taeil Moon. Age: 28, has been working with the agency for five years, has a good record, is a black belt in taekwondo....  _ Doyoung nodded as he quietly read through the information. 

“You’re only a year older than me,” he said absentmindedly. 

“Wow, really?” Taeil replied, eyes widening. “You seem so much younger.”

Doyoung chuckled. “I could say the same for you,” he said softly. “I don’t know about myself though. I feel like I’m somewhere between 27 and 87. Anyway,” he shuffled the papers into a neat pile and focused his eyes on Taeil, “Let’s talk.” 

The other man nodded and smiled. Taeil had great posture, Doyoung noticed. His back was completely straight, his head held high, and his hands were folded in front of him, it was all very formal, and Doyoung didn’t think this was a side effect of nervousness either. Taeil didn’t give away any hint of being intimidated by Doyoung which is different from most people who first meet him. He was simply there, waiting patiently. He also doesn’t seem the type to talk much. 

“You have a really impressive track record, which I got to say, I don’t know what I was expecting. You really don’t look like a bodyguard.” Doyoung said.

Taeil laughed. “It’s all good, I get that a lot. Some clients actually prefer that though because it makes them more comfortable, Mr. Kim.”

Doyoung held up a hand to stop him. “Please call me Doyoung. Mr. Kim is only reserved for the interns and old, crotchety board members.”

“Alright, fair enough,” Taeil laughed. “So Doyoung, let’s say you do hire me as your guard. What would the job entail?”

“Mostly just escorting me from work to home and vice versa. I have recently gotten myself into an uncomfortable situation and I just want to keep my privacy intact as well as my younger cousin safe, should the need arise, until this blows over.”

Taeil nodded. “Ok, any other personal requirements I should be aware of?”

“It’s not really a requirement, but more of a preference.” Doyoung leaned in closer before saying, “You can dress down. Business casual or regular casual but keep it appropriate. The only reason I say this is because khaki makes me sad.”

Taeil laughed again at that. “Should’ve expected that from a fashion editor,” he said.

Their meeting went on for about 20 minutes longer before Doyoung came to the decision that he would give Taeil a shot. He was quiet and a little odd but he seemed like a genuinely nice person and, according to the agency, he was good at his job. (Also, was it bad that Doyoung wanted to see Taeil in action? He still had a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that this person, who looks like an adorable Christmas elf, had the skill set to protect anyone.)

After Taeil left, Doyoung was given some alone time in his office and he let out a deep breath. The week didn’t start off too well, but it could have been a lot worse. No one has really bothered or harassed him about the news except for a few reporters who were waiting outside the  _ Vogue  _ building yesterday, but luckily, security was there to shoo them off and help Doyoung get inside. If it stays like this for the next couple of days, then he might only need Taeil for a week or two. That is, if Doyoung doesn’t act a fool and escalates the situation himself.

Doyoung looked down at his phone for what feels like the 20th time in 30 minutes. Jaehyun hasn’t texted him since they met on Sunday and Doyoung was at loss on what to do. While they did agree to meet again on Doyoung’s terms, what was he supposed to do? He didn’t feel particularly comfortable with inviting Jaehyun to his home (especially with Jeno there) because that was his private space, and he didn’t want someone he barely knew invading it. He figured Jaehyun had to work himself up just to invite Doyoung over. But being caught on a night out on the town with someone you’re involved with like this also has its own issues. Doyoung groaned. Why exactly did he agree to this?

“Need some ibuprofen?” 

Doyoung looked up and met eyes with Jungwoo, the other still calm, but his expression was worried. The older man shook his head. “No, thank you. I’m just overthinking things,” he said, taking a sip of his tea.

“Oh, so the usual. Cool,” Jungwoo responded with a shrug and went over to drop some documents on Doyoung’s desk. “Some articles for the new edition are here and in need of feedback.”

“God, please don’t let the tweed article be in that pile.”

“It is,” Jungwoo said quickly. Doyoung inhaled slowly and exhaled even slower. “To be fair, you did say Haechan could propose it for this month and it seems like it's been approved.” 

“Yes, I guess I did. Remind me to find out who approved it.”

Jungwoo nodded silently and didn’t move for a bit. Doyoung could feel the other man studying him intensely, and it was making his whole face heat up in the worst way possible. Patting the stack of documents down on his desk, he looked up to where Jungwoo was standing in front of him. “Is there something wrong?” he asked.

Jungwoo squinted and hummed. “Yeah, what’s going on with you? Something’s off.”

Doyoung was confused. Was he being that obvious? “I don’t know what you mean,” he lied.

Jungwoo pursed his lips, not buying any of Doyoung’s shit. “Doyoung, I’ve been your assistant for a while now and if there’s one thing I know about you, it’s that you’re actually a terrible liar. You can feel the weird tension and stress in the atmosphere,” he said with a wave of the hand, gesturing around the room. “Is this about Jaehyun?” he whispered, as if he was waiting for Doyoung to confirm a conspiracy theory. 

“Why are you so loud?” Doyoung hissed back. 

Jungwoo gasped and with a knowing, shit eating grin on his face, sat down in the chair opposite to Doyoung. He neatly folded his hands on his lap. “It obviously is. Now, spill it.”

“There’s nothing to spill!” Doyoung nearly shouted. 

“Then why are you so antsy? Every time I come in here, you keep checking your phone.”

Doyoung groaned and laid his forehead against the wood of his desk. “Fine, fine. Just fine.” He sat up and ran a hand through his hair. “Yes, Jaehyun is messing up all of my thoughts.”

“I knew it,” Jungwoo said. “What happened?”

“So,” Doyoung started before getting uncomfortable. He hadn’t told anyone about his dinner with Jaehyun, not even Taeyong. (He’s positive Taeyong is going to scream at him for this when he does find out.) “Jaehyun and I had dinner together on Sunday night.”

Jungwoo’s eyes widened. He looked mildly impressed with Doyoung. “Wow, look at you, where’d you go?”

“He, uh, invited me over to his place.” He scowled when Jungwoo urged him to continue. “Listen, all that happened was we had dinner and we talked about how we’re handling the gossip that broke out.”

Jungwoo rested his chin on his palm and smiled coyly. “Uh huh, you’re sure that was all?”

Doyoung swore he could feel himself getting redder by the second. “Yes,” he said firmly. 

“See, your mouth says ‘yes’ but the rest of your face says ‘no.”

“Can you please let it go, Jungwoo?” Doyoung implored. He wasn’t above begging but he really didn’t feel like doing it. 

Jungwoo frowned this time. “Why can’t  _ you  _ let it go?” he asked back. “If you’re adamant that nothing happened and all you did was talk, then why is he still in your head?”

Doyoung can count on one hand how many times he’s ever thought about seriously firing Jungwoo. This was only the third time, but it was also the most irritating. Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself. Jungwoo wasn’t going to let this go and Doyoung was becoming weary already. “Because,” he started, “we're going to be meeting again soon. Don’t know when or where but he’s letting me choose the details on that. Are you satisfied?”

For the record, Jungwoo seemed really happy that Doyoung finally told the truth, even if it was only part of it. However, his smile fell suddenly. “You know, I’m really happy for you but where would you invite him to? Definitely not your house. The fact that you were invited over to his is strange enough.”

And that was why Doyoung couldn’t fire him; Jungwoo knew him like the back of his hand sometimes. Meanwhile, Doyoung sighed and shrugged. “I don’t know yet.”

“Hmm, I’ll keep an eye out for interesting places. Small, private spots, you know. But tell me one more thing,” Jungwoo said and Doyoung wanted to jump out of the nearest window. “What are you guys? Is this a date or what?”

Doyoung shook his head. “He says he just wants to get to know me. I figured that would be fine. He’s a sweet guy and the rumors will die down eventually. Maybe we could even be friends.”

“Do you want anything more than that?” 

Doyoung fell silent. He knew that he liked being around Jaehyun. To what extent, he wasn’t sure. Friends don’t kiss friends. “I don’t know. Is that bad?”

Jungwoo shook his head and gave Doyoung a lovely smile. “Not at all,” he said. “It’s honest.”

Doyoung is incredibly happy that he didn’t fire Jungwoo. While the conversation was annoying and embarrassing to say the least, his heart feels a little lighter. “Oh, by the way,” Doyoung said when Jungwoo moved to get up from his seat. “Keep this information to yourself, please. Taeyong doesn’t know about any of this yet.”

“Oof,” Jungwoo breathed out and he looked genuinely sorry for Doyoung. “Good luck dealing with that storm.”

~~~~~~

Doyoung didn’t reach out to Jaehyun until the day after to arrange another… date? Meeting? Friendly conversation and chill? It was mostly because he had to work himself up for it but also because Jungwoo came through and found a spot for them to meet. 

_ “You know you didn’t have to do this, right?” Doyoung had said to him when Jungwoo came with the news. _

_ The younger man shrugged. “I know, but I had some free time before lunch and I figured I would help you out because you’re obviously going to struggle with this for awhile. Besides, you can let me know if this place is any good afterwards.” He sent the restaurant info to Doyoung. “You can set up private reservations and if you ask, they’ll let you guys leave through either the side or back exits to avoid any reporters.” _

Jungwoo really outdid himself and Doyoung thanked him by buying him lunch. 

**DY: Are you free on Friday night?**

**JH: Wow I thought you would never text me**

**JH: But yes, I am :)**

**DY: Would you like to have dinner?**

**JH: Of course, gorgeous**

**JH: Just give me a time and place and im all yours**

Doyoung tried not to think too hard about Jaehyun calling him gorgeous as he sent the information to said man. “Friends, friends, best possible friends…” he mumbled to himself, putting his phone down on his desk and walked over to the large windows. It was a sunny day in the city, spring finally settling in. A cool breeze blew through the slightly opened window, sending in air and the smell of car fumes and the noise of the people on the ground along with it. 

At some point, Doyoung was going to have to sit down and have a long, personal conversation with himself about his feelings towards Jaehyun. He felt like a teenager denying the fact that they have a crush on the popular kid in school. But he didn’t feel like confronting those feelings right now.

~~~~~~

The rest of the week had passed without much fanfare or trouble and Doyoung couldn’t be more grateful. If something were to have gone awry, he would’ve probably cancelled dinner. But here he was, staring intensely in his closet as he tried to decide what to wear. The place they were going to is a restaurant called Howlin’ 404, located in the middle of the Financial District. Doyoung had never been there before but the reviews online looked promising and when Jungwoo had set up the reservation for him and Jaehyun, he had also mentioned to the staff that they might need to use an alternate exit from the other diners. 

Doyoung sighed. It was already 6PM, he had to leave in half an hour, and he was still in his sweats. He wonders what Jaehyun would wear to a place like this. It didn’t seem like a fancy spot, despite the prices. Maybe he doesn’t need to get  _ dressed  _ up. Would Jaehyun care if he was? 

Doyoung shook his head. “Why would that even matter?” he mumbled to himself as he moved hangers around. “I’m just going to look like a whole ass meal. As long as I think I look good, that’s all that matters. Right?”

“Who the fuck are you talking to?”

Doyoung whirled around to see an amused Jeno watching him from the door, a granola bar in his hand. Seol sauntered in and rubbed her head on Doyoung’s leg. “Dude. How long have you been standing there?”

“Not long,” Jeno said with a shrug. “I was on my way back from the kitchen when I heard you talking to yourself.”

With a roll of the eyes, Doyoung turned back to his current mission. “I’m going out tonight and I have no idea what to wear,” he said, pulling out a random shirt, pursing his lips, and then putting it back.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m meeting a friend for dinner.”

“Oh my,” Jeno said, his tone suggestive. Doyoung didn’t even want to look at him. “A friend?” 

“A. Friend,” Doyoung deadpanned. 

Jeno laughed. “If you say so, bro. Is this place super fancy?”

“Not really,” Doyoung hummed. “But it’s not too casual either.”

“Hmm.” Jeno looked thoughtful for a moment. It seemed to stretch before he finally moved towards Doyoung. Swiftly, he rummaged through Doyoung’s closet before pulling out a pair of black skinny jeans, a black turtleneck, and Doyoung’s favorite black leather jacket. He held the clothes out to Doyoung. “Either wear your boots or your white tennis shoes with this.”

Doyoung was appalled. “Who are you?” he whispered. “You’re not Jeno. He wouldn’t have made a decision like this.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Jeno grumbled, hitting Doyoung on the shoulder lightly. “Give me some credit. You act like I haven’t learned anything from living with you for so long. You don’t have to wear that outfit but I figured you need the help.”

Doyoung smiled and ruffled Jeno's hair. God, he loved him. “You did well, Jeno,” he said. “I’m just surprised. I always thought you never paid attention to me when I nag you about clothes.”

“Yeah, because you’re supposed to be better at this than me. You know, it’s your whole job.”

“Ok, now you’re overstaying your welcome, get out.” Doyoung shooed the younger man to the door of his room. “I have to get dressed and go soon.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Jeno waved off as he walked away. “By the way, since you’re going out, I’m inviting Jaemin over,” he said over his shoulder.

Doyoung had to raise an eyebrow at that. “You know you can invite your  _ friend  _ over any time, right?” He laughed quietly when he heard Jeno’s bedroom door slam shut. 

~~~~~~

After the whole process of getting dressed, doing his hair, and hyping himself up, Doyoung finally managed to flag down a cab (he really didn’t feel like driving) and arrived at the restaurant 15 minutes before their reservation time. Jaehyun hadn’t arrived yet and, to be honest, Doyoung was pretty happy about that. It gave him time to settle down and continue telling himself positive reinforcements.

The waitress was a pretty blonde who set him up in a booth in a far corner of the restaurant. However, it still gave him a view of the entrance. The place was pretty nice, actually. It was lit in warm shades of gold and brown. In the center of the restaurant was a pillar that was lit up like a palm tree. The chairs were made of soft green leather, and the tables were a solid black granite, each one topped with expensive silverware and a little candle. Slow love songs from the 60s played softly from hidden speakers above him. There was definitely an intimate feeling inside this restaurant and Doyoung wasn’t particularly mad about it. He did feel strangely out of place by himself but it wasn’t for long. For some reason though, this felt strangely more personal than when he was at Jaehyun’s apartment. 

_ Wise men say only fools rush in _

_ But I can’t help falling love with you _

Only so many people knew this about Doyoung but he was actually a sucker for a good love song. He got lost in Elvis’ voice for a moment, swaying a little to the music. It was so simple and sounded so sincere, and really, that was all Doyoung wanted in a life partner; a simple relationship based on sincere emotions and mutual love and respect. He was human, he craved intimacy. Shit, maybe he is going soft in the head.

_ Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? _

_ If I can’t help falling in love with you _

It wasn’t a terrible thing to want though. It’s what his parents had, so Doyoung knew a love like that actually existed. He didn’t need anything else. He was already capable of taking care of himself, but was the point of any of this if he was going to be alone forever? Jeno is going to move out eventually and then Doyoung would be alone in a big city again. He was not going to admit this to anyone but he was a little terrified of being by himself. But then again, he reasoned, who wasn’t?

_ Like a river flows, surely to the sea _

_ Darling so it goes _

_ Somethings are meant to be _

There was movement by the entrance and it caught Doyoung’s attention. He had lost track of time altogether. Checking his watch, he realized it was only 7:05PM. Maybe it’s still early to roast Jaehyun on his punctuality. 

_ Take my hand _

_ Take my whole life too _

_ For I can’t help falling in love with you _

Looking back up, Doyoung nearly choked. Nearly. He was still in public though so his brain and body settled for a soft gasp. Jaehyun was walking towards him, dressed in a pair of tight black pants with rips at the knees and a black button down, the top few buttons undone. It was simple but it looked so good on him. His leather boots clicked and clacked against the floor as he came for Doyoung’s soul. Doyoung was reminded of that night in the club all over again; Thanatos, the god of death, coming for him once more. 

But that wasn’t what did Doyoung in. Jaehyun had traded in his dark blue hair for soft, wavy peach pink tresses. That was it. Total knockout. Doyoung had gone most of his adult life thinking that Taeyong was the only one who could pull off outlandish hair colors but here he was, being proven wrong again. 

“Hello,” Jaehyun said, a grin on his face as he took a seat across from Doyoung, as if it were another normal night.

“Hi,” Doyoung said softly, hoping his face wasn’t giving too much away.

_ Like a river flows, surely to the sea _

_ Darling so it goes _

_ Somethings are meant to be _

As Jaehyun sat down, Doyoung was hit with a sudden rush of emotions, all of them confusing and making his brain hazy. He hated how Jaehyun had this effect on him. He could so easily melt Doyoung with just one look and a simple “hello”. He was so screwed. What were the chances that Jaehyun was the person he wanted to share that simple and sincere type of affection with? He shouldn’t even be thinking so far ahead. Also, what made him believe Jaehyun wanted the same thing? 

_ Take my hand _

_ Take my whole life too _

_ For I can’t help falling in love with you _

_ For I can’t help falling in love with you _

Was it bad that he already knew what he wanted the answer to be?

“Are you ok?” Jaehyun asked. 

Doyoung nodded, a smile working its way to his face. “Yeah, it’s just--” He gestured to his own head and said, “The hair caught me off guard.”

Jaehyun laughed, his eyes turning into happy little arches and Doyoung was physically upset by it. “Oh, yeah. I wanted to keep it a secret. How do you like it?” he asked, shaking his head so it would ruffle the slight waves in his hair. “I really liked the blue but I figured it’s time for some change.”

Doyoung couldn’t help but chuckle. “You know, even if you were to have told me that you dyed your hair pink, I probably wouldn’t have believed you,” he said. “But it looks good, but I’m not surprised that you pull it off.”

Jaehyun smiled back at him before they were interrupted by the waitress, who brought them warm Italian bread and olive oil, took their drink orders, and gave them some time to look through the menus. Within 15 minutes, they had ordered and were sipping on their drinks: Doyoung was working through a Moscow mule while Jaehyun had red wine. 

“You know, I never took you as a wine person,” Doyoung commented as he ripped off a piece of bread. 

“Not many people do,” Jaehyun responded, watching Doyoung eat, his chin resting in the palm of his hand. “Wine is for social situations like this. Harder stuff is for parties.” 

Doyoung raised an eyebrow at that. “Really now?” He knew all too well what happens when Jaehyun drinks liquor, even if he’s only experienced it once. 

Jaehyun hummed before his face broke out in an amused grin. “You chew like a rabbit,” he said softly.

Doyoung dropped his bread on his plate, an exasperated sigh escaping his nose as he swallowed the bite he was working on. “Listen, you’re not the first person to say that, but it’s still annoying to hear nonetheless,” he said, frowning but only for a second. The smile broke free when he saw Jaehyun cock an eyebrow at him. “Seriously though, don’t say that around other people.”

“Oh, so I can call you Rabbit in private?”

“No,” Doyoung deadpanned.

“We’ll see about that,” Jaehyun responded. 

The conversation flowed easily and before they knew it, it was time for appetizers. Doyoung spoke while they shared fries and stuffed mushrooms, describing his week in detail. Jaehyun listened carefully to everything he said, not really throwing in his opinion unless he felt like it. Then he told Doyoung about how he actually flew out to Boston for a shoot during the week, and how much fun it was. Doyoung found out that Jaehyun loves traveling, even if it is solely for work. His next big shoot is going to be in Los Angeles. It still surprises Doyoung how easy this feels. Back when he did use to pursue relationships, everything always felt rushed. The meeting, the dating, the sex, the coming out, it was all too much. But with Jaehyun and… whatever this relationship they had was, it felt relaxed. Doyoung felt relaxed, despite the fact that Jaehyun’s very existence sets his nerves on fire. Being with Jaehyun felt honest, like neither one of them had much to hide, even if it was only the third meeting. 

Should he start referring to these meetings as dates? That feels very official. Maybe a little too official.

They fell quiet when their entrees arrived, Doyoung not realizing how hungry he was until the waitress set down his chicken marsala in front of him. They ate in comfortable silence for a bit and Doyoung made a mental note to tell Jungwoo that the restaurant was actually great.

Of course, things can never last. Doyoung heard the quiet clinking of utensils being put down and he looked up to see Jaehyun looking at him with a strange expression. Well, the comfort of casual conversation is over. Might as well get to the nitty gritty part.

“What are we?” Jaehyun asked, still as straightforward as ever.

Doyoung put his fork down, his mind running a mile a minute. He fiddled with his napkin as he mulled the question over. Suddenly, the restaurant felt a little too stuffy.

There was nothing Doyoung could be but honest. “I don’t know,” he said softly, hoping Jaehyun could still hear him. “I really like you, I do. I just-- don’t know. I haven’t been this intimate with someone in a while? Is that the right word? It’s a bit hard for me to adjust.”

Jaehyun looked down at this half finished risotto. “I understand,” he replied.

“I like being around you. My feelings are just really confusing right now. I want to be your friend but I also want to keep making out with you,” Doyoung said, chuckling at how stupid he sounds. “Maybe it’s just a matter of getting to know you better.”

“Why are you such a private person?” Jaehyun asked suddenly. 

Doyoung was caught off guard by him for the nth time. Blinking, he slowly answered. “Um, well, I’ve always valued my privacy, especially when I started my job at the magazine and there was suddenly a small spotlight on me. I guess it just allows me some breathing space.” He paused and bit his lip. “Also, I have been used for my position before and it’s exhausting. I’m not saying that you would do that and it’s not that I’m closed off to the idea of a relationship, but I don’t have the time and energy to pursue something more unless I feel like it’ll be worth it in the end. I guess I have unresolved trust issues.” Doyoung sighed. Normally, he’d be pretty proud of how honest he can be with someone he’s only met a few times, but this feels like a make or break moment.

Jaehyun nodded slowly. “At least you’re open about it.”

“Oh, of course. You and I are both adults. We’re too old for games.”

Jaehyun kept looking at him, but there was something softer in his eyes now. “I do appreciate that. I do have one request from you though.” 

Doyoung nodded for him to continue, his food long forgotten in front of him. 

“If we’re going to keep meeting like this, we should at least acknowledge them as dates,” Jaehyun said. “I realize this is only the second time that we’ve met over food and drinks but you know where I stand, and now I know how you feel.”

Doyoung raised his eyebrows. “Dates?”

“Mhmm,” Jaehyun hummed. “There are no hard commitments, we’re still getting to know each other, and we can keep it between us but it would be nice if we didn’t have to hide under the blanket of ‘possible best friends’.” 

It took Doyoung a moment to realize that Jaehyun was just asking for more honesty and that he was willing to give Doyoung the same respect back. He thought about it for a moment. It still felt strange but there was an earnestness in Jaehyun’s eyes. 

Doyoung exhaled, a defeated smile on his face. “Alright,” he said and his smile widened when he saw the way Jaehyun smiled. “But,” he interjected. “If this relationship or whatever goes south, we are never speaking again,” he warned, deadly serious. 

Jaehyun simply blinked before smiling even wider. “I think we’ll be just fine,” he said, picking up his fork again. 

Whatever reaction Doyoung was expecting, that wasn’t it, but he couldn’t find it within himself to wonder further about it. As if on cue though, soft synth and piano notes began flooding out of the speakers.

_ So what about these feelings I’ve got? _

_ We got it wrong _

_ And you said you had enough _

_ What’s about these feelings I’ve got? _

_ I couldn’t be more in love _

~~~~~~

They were finishing up with the bill when Doyoung’s phone buzzed. (Doyoung had to make threats to Jaehyun’s life in order to force the other man to let him pay the bill. “I swear to god, give me the bill or I will set you on fire right here in this damn restaurant,” he had said. Jaehyun didn’t seem afraid at all but he relented nonetheless, probably knowing that he wouldn’t be able to win this fight.)

**jeNO: hey, change of plans. Im going out with jaemin and some friends tonight**

**jeNO: don’t know when i’ll be home but i’ll keep you posted**

Doyoung grinned as he typed a response. “What’s so funny?” Jaehyun asked. 

“It’s Jeno. I’m just being a good cousin and reminding him to be safe.” 

**doie: watch out for each other**

**doie: also make sure to use protection!**

**jeNO: dude shut the fuck up**

Doyoung laughed as he put his phone away. Sighing, he looked at Jaehyun. “I had a really good time tonight.”

“So did I,” Jaehyun said. He chewed on his bottom lip, suddenly looking shyer than Doyoung has ever seen him. “I almost don’t want it to end.”

Doyoung was quiet for a moment, his heart beating way too fast for its own good. Finally, he felt his whole face soften as he smiled slightly. “Me neither. I really enjoy talking to you,” he said. 

Jaehyun rubbed the back of his neck and Doyoung had to admit, seeing this side of him was pretty endearing. It was a reminder that he was just as human as everyone else. “Do you…” Jaehyun started, “Do you want to come back to my place? I’m only ten minutes away by cab. We could have some champagne and talk some more. It’s not too late in the night yet.”

Jaehyun was giving him a way out, a chance to call it a night, and the more discreet part of Doyoung’s brain compelled him to take it. But he didn’t want to go home at the moment. He didn’t want to return to an empty apartment, not when there was someone here who was willing to keep him company. 

Whether or not he was being overly dramatic about the situation, Doyoung simply nodded and said, “I would love that.” He swore, Jaehyun’s face was brighter than the sun.

~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yoooooo what did yall think about Punch though??


	4. What a Time to Be Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three friends meet for brunch and an interrogation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this at 3am so forgive me if it's terrible and sappy

Doyoung woke up to his phone going off, the ringtone blasting a lot louder than it really should be at 9AM. Groaning, he reached around on his nightstand before finally finding the damn thing and answering. 

“Hello?” he greeted, voice raspy and scratchy. 

“Meet me at Cherry Bomb for brunch at 12,” was what he was met with. 

“Wait, what the fuck?”

“Doyoung, it’s Taeyong.”

Doyoung threw the comforter over his head. “Jesus Christ, couldn’t you call at a normal time?” he groaned. 

“Um. No. Since you like to keep secrets, I get to bug you all I want,” Taeyong huffed back to him through the phone. “I’ll fight you if you’re not there on time.” And with that, Taeyong hung up.

Doyoung sighed loudly. He deserved whatever Taeyong was going to throw at him today, he knew it. He tossed and turned for what felt like 20 minutes more before finally coming to terms with the fact that he isn’t going to get any more sleep. Sighing again, he stared up at the ceiling and questioned his entire existence. Sunlight was leaking in through the slightly parted curtains and he could hear cars honking outside. He couldn’t remember exactly what time he got home last night, but he was guessing it had to have been around midnight. His phone buzzed next to him but he ignored it. He didn’t want to look at any notifications at the moment, especially since he has a feeling he knows what he’s going to see. 

He closed his eyes and breathed steadily. The least he could do is try to stay calm and rest his brain for a little while longer. 

But this was Doyoung’s reality, and in Doyoung’s reality, one never knew exactly what to expect. And Doyoung definitely didn’t expect Jeno to throw his door open and whip a pillow at him. 

“What the fuck?!” Doyoung shouted, face shocked as he held the pillow up before throwing it back at Jeno. “What are you doing?”

“Payback for two weeks ago,” Jeno said, tone matter of fact as he picked his pillow back up. 

“For what?!” 

Jeno gestured to the phone next to Doyoung. “You know exactly what, lover boy.”

Doyoung stared at Jeno before finally looking down at his phone. He had a couple of messages and emails, most of them work related. His eyes fell to a certain notification from one Taeyong Lee. He had sent Doyoung a message over Twitter, linking him to a news article and the headline made Doyoung cringe a little. 

_ “New Couple Alert? Jaehyun Jung and Doyoung Kim seen leaving a Manhattan restaurant together.”  _

Attached to the article were somewhat blurry pictures of said men and it looked like they were taken across the street from Howlin’ 404. Jaehyun’s pink hair stood out brightly, even in the darkness of the evening. Doyoung sighed, suddenly very tired. He put the phone down and immediately fell back onto the bed, letting out a soft ‘oof’ when his head hit the pillow. “I walked right into this one.”

“Mhmm,” Jeno hummed, arms crossed. Seol sauntered into the room, rubbing her head on Jeno’s leg before making a beeline for Doyoung’s bed. “Nothing against you going out with this guy but what happened to you not wanting the attention.”

Seol jumped onto the bed and Doyoung didn’t even try to stop her as she climbed up and laid on his stomach. “I don’t know,” Doyoung said. “I didn’t think I was going to be in this position but here I am. Turns out Jaehyun isn’t a terrible human to be around.”

“So like, are you guys dating?”

“We go on dates but I wouldn’t say we’re dating.”

Doyoung wasn’t even looking but he could tell Jeno was pulling a face at him. “Do you realize how stupid that sounds?” the younger man said. 

“I know. My feelings are just complicated.” Doyoung’s eyes never left the ceiling but he allowed himself to scratch Seol’s ears. The cat purred happily as Doyoung continued. “I’m not in a rush to put a label on things. I like going slow, and I think with Jaehyun, it’s important to do so.”

Jeno pursed his lips and nodded. “Fair enough. So did you guys just go out for dinner last night?” he asked. 

There was a pause. Doyoung’s hand stilled on Seol’s head for a second as he thought back to the night before. He remembered rough hands on his waist again, soft piano music, and the smell of Jaehyun’s cologne mingling with his own. He recalled feeling so warm from the inside out, it felt like he would’ve melted right there in Jaehyun’s arms. 

“Yeah. That was it,” Doyoung lied. He stole a look at Jeno and wasn’t surprised to see the unimpressed expression on the younger’s face. However Jeno felt though, he didn’t pry any further. “Listen, Jeno, I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

Jeno gasped, a hand flying to his mouth in mock shock. “Oh no, the great Doyoung Kim doesn’t know how to act around cute boys? The audacity...”

“Yes, I know. I, unfortunately, am human,” Doyoung said with the same amount of drama. Jeno laughed as he went over and sat down next to Doyoung’s listless body.

“Is Jaehyun at least nice to you?” Jeno asked softly.

Doyoung nodded, a small smile gracing his face. “He’s so nice to me, Jeno. I think you would love to meet him. Also, he can cook,” he said. 

Jeno pursed his lips again. “Ok, but so can you? Also, how do you know this?”

Doyoung’s lips fell into a tightline. He was going to have to be honest at some point, especially in matters concerning both Jaehyun and Jeno. “Uh, remember I went out to dinner last weekend too? Well, it was at Jaehyun’s place and he made a really nice pasta dinner.”

Jeno stared at him, brows furrowed and mouth agape. “Look at you keeping secrets,” he mumbled. His eyes suddenly widened. “Wait a minute. If you didn’t tell me… Did you tell Taeyong?” 

Doyoung stared silently at his cousin, knowing he didn’t have to say a single word. 

Jeno’s mouth turned into a small ‘o’ before breaking out into a wicked grin.

“Shut up,” Doyoung said, glaring at him.

“Should I start planning your funeral now or later?”

“Oh, Jesus Christ.” Doyoung gave up. This was just his existence now, he guesses. He threw an arm over his eyes. There was a brief moment of silence before Jeno could hear a quiet, “Plan my funeral now.”

Jeno nodded enthusiastically. “You got it. Tell me though, do I get the apartment when you’re dead?”

“Get out of my room, you asswipe”.

~~~~~~

It took some motivation but Doyoung finally managed to convince himself to get out of bed an hour later and get dressed. He opted for a more casual look, donning a billowy baby blue button down with a pair of black skinny jeans, and his favorite newsboy cap.

Cherry Bomb was a brunch spot located in the Upper East Side and it was a personal favorite for both Doyoung and Taeyong. The food was delicious and the aesthetic was a bonus. When the weather gets nicer, the eatery opens up a terrace on the second floor of the restaurant and is always decorated with seasonal flowers. At the moment, the terrace was decorated with a mix of camellias, rhododendrons, and stalks of forsythia. Each table had a small arrangement of red tulips and yellow daffodils. Little patches of purple crocuses peeked out here and there. If Doyoung had to pick a public place to get roasted by Taeyong in, this would be it.

Doyoung made it on time and to his surprise, he was greeted by both Taeyong and Jungwoo. Taeyong sat casually with his legs crossed, face stoic and eyes hidden behind a pair of sunglasses. In his hands was a cup of iced coffee. Jungwoo, on the other hand, looked like he didn’t have a care in the world. When he saw Doyoung, his face broke out in a bright smile and Doyoung felt slightly more comfortable just knowing that Jungwoo was there. Taeyong wouldn’t kill him in front of Jungwoo. A couple of tables away sat Yuta, still way too overdressed in a marble button down and tight pants to look like your average bodyguard. He had a small book opened in front of him.

Doyoung took the seat across from Taeyong. “Tae,” he said.

“Doie,” he responded. Silence followed.

“Hi, boss!” Jungwoo said, smiling even brighter. If Doyoung didn’t know any better, he would’ve thought Jungwoo was really forcing it. “I ordered a tea for you.”

“Thank you, Woo,” Doyoung said before turning back to Taeyong, who’s expression hasn’t changed as far as Doyoung could tell. “So you brought a child as a mediator?” Doyoung didn’t miss the offended look on Jungwoo’s face but he kept his focus on Taeyong. 

The older man leaned forward, his hands steepled in front of him. “Jungwoo is here to make sure you get out of this situation alive,” Taeyong said. “Doyoung, I know you’re a whole adult and all but why wouldn’t you tell me about you and Jaehyun? We tell each other everything.”

Doyoung took a cautious sip of his tea, the drink already lukewarm. Setting the cup back down, he frowned. “I don’t know.” 

Taeyong wasn’t impressed.

“Listen, listen, before you pop off. I didn’t expect this to happen between me and Jaehyun either. We had dinner twice, my feelings got all confused, and now I  _ think  _ we’re dating,” Doyoung said, raising a hand in surrender. 

Taeyong took his glasses off. “Excuse me? Did you say twice? Jungwoo, did you know?” he suddenly asked the youngest of the group.

Jungwoo’s eyes darted quickly between them but Doyoung answered for him. “Yes, he did but leave him out of this. I met up with Jaehyun the Sunday after the party. He invited me over for a meal and we talked about what happened at the club. That was it. And then last night we met for dinner again at Howlin’.”

Taeyong couldn’t look more incredulous. He pressed a finger to his temple. “And now you guys are dating,” he deadpanned.

Doyoung waved his hand around uncomfortably. “Something like that,” he said. 

Taeyong rolled his eyes and said, “Alright, you know what? Let’s get some food and then you’re going to tell me about last night. There’s no point in being hangry at a restaurant.”

Doyoung and Jungwoo quickly agreed: one was finally happy to be free of Taeyong’s gaze and the other was genuinely hungry. After they ordered, Jungwoo kept them busy with a brand new topic of discussion. 

“So,” he began, swirling his mimosa around in his glass. “I met this guy. He’s an absolute goof of a human being but very cute.”

The already quiet table fell even more silent as all eyes fell on Jungwoo. “Go on,” Doyoung urged. A breeze passed through them, bringing with it the smell of flowers and sunshine. How appropriate for Jungwoo.

Said man grinned. “I went out with some friends to a bar last night and met this guy who says he’s currently trying to become a model. He’s so gorgeous, guys. Probably an inch or two taller than me, his skin was tan and he had such a bright smile. He was kind of loud and had somewhat chaotic energy but that’s ok. It made him all the more endearing.”

“Wait,” Taeyong stopped him. “Good, neutral, or evil?”

“Oh, good, definitely,” Jungwoo reassured him. “Anyway, we exchanged numbers and I think we might have a date soon. I don’t want to name names yet, because who knows if this is even going to go anywhere.”

“Fair enough.” Taeyong pursed his lips. A waitress came by and began setting down their food. “At least you’re honest, Jungwoo,” he said, pointedly looking at Doyoung over the rim of his mimosa flute.

Doyoung rolled his eyes. “Oh, shut up and eat your damn panini.” 

Fortunately, for Doyoung’s sake, they ate quietly, only mumbling compliments towards the food. Doyoung spotted another waitress walk up to Yuta’s table and set down a coffee and a plate of eggs benedict in front of him, the latter smiling gratefully up at her. 

Apparently, while Doyoung was watching Yuta, Taeyong was watching him. “Bodyguards need to eat too,” he said passively. 

“I think you treat him really well,” Doyoung replied with a shrug, turning back to his salmon and avocado toast. “The one they sent me is a little quiet and strange but he seems like a nice guy.”

“Hmm,” was Taeyong’s response. “So are you going to finally tell us everything? Or do I have to wait for another news article?”

Sighing, Doyoung downed the rest of his mimosa, the bitterness of the champagne making him cringe a bit. “Fine, fine,” he relented. 

~~~~~~

_ Last night… _

“I think your place is actually really cozy,” Doyoung said, tucking his legs under himself as he settled down into Jaehyun’s couch. “The lights and the bricks make everything feel so… warm.”

Jaehyun chuckled as he handed Doyoung a glass of champagne. Sitting down on the other side of the couch, he said, “You’ve got Johnny to thank for that. He has a better eye for design than I do and he helped put this place together.”

“Oh, have you guys worked together a lot in the past?”

“Johnny and I have actually known each other since high school,” Jaehyun said, eyes not leaving Doyoung’s. “It’s just kind of ironic how things worked out with our respective careers. He’s my favorite photographer to work with for obvious reasons.” He smiled, eyes crinkling in that happy-go-lucky way that never escapes Doyoung’s attention. 

Doyoung smiled back before looking down into his glass. “That’s almost like me and Taeyong, except we met in college. We were roommates for a year and I remember we used to legit hate each other.” Doyoung laughed, thinking back to the days where him and Taeyong would bicker over the smallest things like who left their dishes in the sink for days and who had to be the one to go pick up more toilet paper. 

“What changed?”

“We realized that we were the only ones who could put up with the other’s bullshit,” Doyoung said, grinning. “Taeyong kept me grounded and I made sure he didn’t overwork himself to death.”

“Is that what you look for in people?” 

Doyoung looked at Jaehyun in confusion. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Jaehyun turned to face him fully, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. Doyoung could feel his face growing warmer under Jaehyun’s gaze. He hated it. “Do you look for people who make you feel grounded all the time?”

Doyoung nodded. Putting his half full glass on the coffee table, he rubbed his hands against his thighs, suddenly feeling a bit uncomfortable. He’s been spilling his guts a lot to Jaehyun tonight. When was it going to stop?

“Yes,” he finally said. “I usually don’t meet those types of people professionally so I really appreciate my close friends. I just-- I guess I need someone to just remind me of my own gravity sometimes. That I don’t have to get every single task down in one day, eating and sleeping regularly is what normal humans do, and that working constantly isn’t going to bring me any sense of real happiness.”

Jaehyun studied him, but his eyes were soft and non-judgmental. “You really are so complicated.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

Jaehyun shook his head. “Not at all. I actually really like that about you.” He straightened up. “Ever since I moved to this city, it felt like I was seeing everything and everybody through a weird plastic veil. Things just moved so fast. Everybody seemed to know everything about everyone else but it all felt very loose and surface level,” he said, running a hand through his hair. 

“Also, being in my line of work, it gets hard to not be a little cynical sometimes, especially when I really became aware that people found more value in my looks than myself. Models are basically just walking billboards,” Jaehyun mumbled, chuckling a little but it lacked any sort of real emotion. “Anyway, I think this is just my long, winding, and silly way of saying that you remind me that people still have depth to them, despite outer appearances.” 

Doyoung didn’t know how to respond to that. It was everything he felt when he first moved to the city but he managed to suppress those emotions. The loneliness, the feeling of not fitting in, the shallowness of the industry, it was all completely understandable. He also wasn’t ready for Jaehyun to meet his level of candidness, although it really shouldn’t be such a surprise anymore. Both of them wanted a deeper sense of intimacy and understanding and the universe just so happened to bring them together. It felt godsent but terrifying all at once.

And here they both were, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It went unspoken between them but Doyoung could feel it. Both of them were waiting to see if the other was going to become like everybody else in this damned city. Another face in the crowd, another voice over the radio, another wave in a shallow pool. 

The very thought of no longer knowing Jaehyun as a person broke Doyoung’s heart. 

“Play me a song,” Doyoung said suddenly.

“What?”

“Can you please play me one of your songs? I’d like to hear you sing in person.” 

Jaehyun was caught off guard but collected himself quickly. “Alright then,” he said quietly. Getting up, he rubbed his hands together as he sat down at his piano. “Hmm… What would be good for you…” He tapped his fingers silently against the keys, deep in thought.

It came to him quickly. He turned to Doyoung with a smirk. “Count yourself lucky, this is a bit from a single that I’m planning on releasing next month but no one has heard it yet except for the people at the studio.”

“Oh, nice. I get a teaser,” Doyoung laughed.

Jaehyun smiled one last time at him before he started to play. His hands moved swiftly over the piano keys and Doyoung found that he couldn’t stop staring at them. His attention was only taken away once Jaehyun started singing. It was a soft pop ballad and Jaehyun’s voice over the notes was a beautiful combination. Was he a baritone? Doyoung thinks he’s a baritone, his own singing experience limited to high school chorus classes and drunk nights at karaoke bars. 

His heart swelled listening to Jaehyun sing about the object of his affection and how beautiful he thought they were. His voice reminded Doyoung of rainy nights spent indoors, warm bodies under blankets, arms and legs tangled together, and quiet whispers between the sheets. A simple kind of love and Doyoung couldn’t help but wonder…

_ Would Jaehyun write a song about me one day?  _

He shook his head. Now  _ that  _ sounded silly. What would Jaehyun even say about him?

Jaehyun finished, letting his voice and the last note fade away. He turned to Doyoung, eyes hopeful. Doyoung could do nothing but smile at him, his own eyes shining.

Rubbing the back of his neck again, Jaehyun let out a nervous, “At least tell me if you like it or not.”

“It was wonderful,” Doyoung said, his voice quiet and sincere. “You’re so talented.” 

A pink blush creeped up Jaehyun’s neck as he moved back onto the couch. “As long as you think so,” he mumbled, smiling shyly. 

“I do,” Doyoung reaffirmed him. His eyes fell back to Jaehyun’s hands and he didn’t know what higher power compelled him to reach out for them but Doyoung didn’t resist. He couldn’t. 

The sudden movement made Jaehyun jump but he settled back down quickly, both amused and endeared with how Doyoung was rubbing his thumb over Jaehyun’s fingers. 

Meanwhile, Doyoung took in the softness of Jaehyun’s hands, keeping in mind the calluses on his palms. It was almost the same size as his own hand. Jaehyun’s fingers were slim and it was so obvious that they were musician hands. Doyoung almost wishes that they were still painted black too.

“I’m sorry. It sounds weird but, I just think you have really nice hands. Anyone can tell they’re piano player hands,” Doyoung murmured, letting out a soft laugh. 

He moved to pull away but felt Jaehyun’s grip tighten. Doyoung looked up and saw Jaehyun’s eyes were looking down at their hands. A small smile graced his lips. Doyoung could see how long his eyelashes were and he liked the way Jaehyun’s bangs brushed against his forehead. It was the little things. He was so beautiful.

He didn’t realize how closely he was leaning in until Jaehyun looked back up at him and they locked eyes. Doyoung could feel Jaehyun’s breath against his skin and it made his hair stand on end. At the moment, nothing else mattered. Let the whole world be damned, as long as this could last forever. 

Jaehyun tilted his head. “Still think we can be best possible friends?” he whispered against Doyoung’s lips. 

The other man took a deep breath. “No,” he said firmly before sliding his lips onto Jaehyun’s.

~~~~~~

“Are you satisfied?” Doyoung asked, sipping on his second mimosa. He couldn’t help but laugh a little. Taeyong had his glass held up but his face was in disbelief, mouth agape. Meanwhile, Jungwoo nodded approvingly, mouth full of kale salad. “Well? You wanted to know so badly,” Doyoung said to Taeyong. 

It took a minute but a smile slowly broke out on Taeyong’s face. His whole face softened, and his eyes became more gentle. “I’m actually really happy for you, Doie.”

Ok. What?

“What?” he said aloud.

Taeyong nodded, putting his glass down. “It sounds like Jaehyun makes you feel a certain type of way and I think this is something you need. Let’s face it, Doyoung. You’ve been alone for a long time and now you’ve finally found someone who actually makes you feel something akin to, dare I say, love? Or possible love? What I’m trying to say is that I’m happy you’re putting yourself back out there. You deserve someone who takes your breath away and it sounds like Jaehyun might be the one.”

“Oh, wow. Thanks, Tae,” Doyoung replied, feeling more than a little touched by Taeyong’s words.

Taeyong reached over across the table and squeezed Doyoung’s hand. “We’re friends, remember?” Another squeeze, tighter this time. “But if you hide anything like this from me again, I’m going to cut your dick off.”

Doyoung rolled his eyes. “Way to ruin the moment.” He pulled his hand away but he shared a knowing look with Taeyong. They both smiled at each other.

Jungwoo snorted as he sat between them. “You guys didn’t even need me here,” he said. “At least I got food out of this. I’m getting a Belgian waffle, anyone want one?”

~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys~ sorry this chapter took forever for me to post. the current events going on in the united states is making things a bit hard for me at the moment. please continue to support the Black Lives Matter movement by donating and signing petitions. only go to protests if you feel safe enough to do so. i don't want to bring politics into this space but i figured i have a small following in the people who read my stories and it is only right that i bring attention to important real world matters at hand. 
> 
> as always, i hope you all enjoyed this chapter. stay safe, stay healthy, and watch out for one another. -r


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